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Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Men vs. Women Cooking

Check out the Cranky Monkey of Facebook to participate in a discussion on who cooks more and better, men or women.

Monday, December 28, 2009

Top 10 Things from 2009 that I Don't Care About

As the year rolls to a close, these are my top ten items from 2009 that received way to much time in the press and I really don't give a crap about.

10. H1N1 Swine Flue Vaccine - This is a holdover from 2008, but once the vaccine came out, it's all they talked about. Who's getting it? who is not getting it? Does it work? What's the dosage? And of course, how much is being made? Please people! There are so many other things that you are more likely to get, and are much worse for you. Fucking mindless sheep!


9. Boeing 787 Dreamliner - This is a little more local than national, but living in Seattle, it's been impossible to turn on the news, or read the local papers without headlines of the 787. The plane is two years behind schedule and finally flew. That's nice, can we now talk about something else Seattle.


8. The White House Party Crashers - AKA the Salahi's. These people were looking for a little fame, they did it by crashing a white house party, and guess what? They got exactly what they were looking for. Good job America.

7. Balloon Boy - Also on the list of people looking for a little fame, and the mindless public giving it to them. The only saving grace from this is the stiff sentence the judge handed out to this family, hopefully setting an example for others.


6. President Obama - Yes, I am one of the people who had high hopes for the guy and is beginning to feel a little let down. But come on, he's been in office for less than a year, lets give him a break and a chance.


5. Bill O'Reilly - You know people, if you would stop watching his show and clicking on any news article that mentions his name, he would go back to the rock he crawled out from under.

4. Tea Baggers - Speaking of right-wing-testicle-lickers, why is it that an ignorant minority population of the country gets so much face time in the press? Because people in this country watch.

3. Tiger Woods - So the guy sleeps around, who the hell wouldn't in his place. Besides his wife is a hottie, which means she's also probably frigid in bed. Just the honor of fucking her should be enough, she shouldn't actually have to do anything while there. Move on you bunch of prudes.

2. Susan Boyle - Yea! Some ugly fat chick can sing. Did you hear that her CD is the top selling CD right now. That's because most of her fans aren't smart enough to illegally download it like everyone else.

1. Michael Jackson - Everyone hated the guy before he died. Then suddenly he's a beloved pop star after he dies. I don't know if anyone is aware of it, but a half dozen other celebrities died this last year as well.



Wednesday, December 23, 2009

My Kind of Santa

Here you go, my annual Christmas post. No top 10 list this year, no poem, and no prose. This year, you get a picture copied from another site… enjoy and merry fucking Christmas.



Monday, December 21, 2009

Climate Change Deal

To commemorate the less than ideal outcome from the climate talks in Copenhagen last week.

Thursday, December 17, 2009

Them, Me, and the Beer on Tap

As I sit in the bar looking at the people around me, I think to myself at what point do I go from a person who is hanging out with his friends while drinking at the bar during the week, to the guy who is sitting at the bar by himself drinking because he doesn't want to drink at home alone. As if somehow doing it at the bar makes it okay. I'm not alone, I'll be meeting up with friend as the night wears on, I am just the first person to arrive. A few years earlier I might have felt a little uncomfortable at the counter, drinking my IPA and watching the TV above, while crowded tables laughed and joked around me. Yet I notice this night, as I look to the other individuals sitting at the bar, that it's not as uncomfortable as I once thought. How long will it be till the bartenders know my name? How long till I'm one of the guys next to me, who feels perfectly comfortable in the barstool, eating the deep fried or grilled food, and knows exactly what the bar tab will come to at the end of the night. Will it be next week, next year, or maybe even tonight?

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Extra Time, Vicodin, and a Proper Balance of Both

As I lay on the floor, absorbing the effect of the Vicodin I just took, hoping to kill my back pain from sitting at a desk all day; I begin to wonder what makes the artist, musicians, and creative people different from the rest of the world. What makes Vincent van Gogh different from Bill Gates. Why is it Beethoven can create beautiful music, yet the douche bag who sits in the office next to me can’t even hum the Jeopardy theme in proper tune. And thanks to the nausea that goes along with Vicodin, why is it creative people are more prone to alcohol and drug abuse? Jimi Hendrix, a self taught guitarist, used to drop acid before going on stage, and he’s considered one of the greatest rock musicians of all time.

This got me thinking about left brain and right brain people. They say left brain people tend to be more logical and analytical, while right brain people have a more subjective view of the world. I’ve always considered myself a right brain person. I used to do theatre, I paint and shoot photography, and for the most part I can’t stand my office job. My office job that consists of sitting at a desk all day, doing what I’m told, and staying within the mental box along with my right brained co-workers. Most of the people I work with, seem relatively content with what they do. Yes, they might bitch and complain on occasion, but at the end of the day the paycheck, job security, and a stable life take priority over affecting the senses in the world around them. I’ve always faulted these people, wanting to stand up and scream, “What’s wrong with you people? Don’t you see how fucked up this is!” But when it comes down to it, they can’t see. To them this isn’t fucked up, this is the way it should be, this is the way the world works. And in reality, they are right. Without the corporate office monkey’s where would the rest of us be? Hanging out in San Francisco preaching free love? We've seen how well that worked out in the 60’s.

What’s the point of this post and what’s it have to do with drug abuse and artists? Nothing. I’m just feeling a little introspective around this time of year, as I see another year go past while I stagnate at my desk, working for the large soulless corporate giant into a new year.

With the year ending, the workload lightens as it does each year around this time. I could sit at my computer and spend the extra time writing a great novel, or I could spend my time updating blogs and reading the news. The question then becomes, am I a Jack Kerouac or am I just like every other left brain person out there? The only difference between me and them is, I just haven’t realized it yet... Correction, I am one step closer to realization, I can’t hum the Jeopardy theme in tune either.

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Lieberman - Democrat > Independent > Republican

Joe Lieberman should just come out and declare himself a Republican. The congressman from Connecticut at one point in time was a Democrat. That was until his own party decided that he didn't belong, and put an actual Democrat up for election in his state. Unfortunately Lieberman ran as an independent and won. Now, the Democrats are being forced to cater to him in order to get the necessary votes to pass healthcare reform in the senate.

Joe Lieberman has decided to make himself a roadblock to legislation. First he was against the public option, and now he's against expanding Medicare. What he's really against is this bill. Is he bitter about the lack of party support, or is he just a Republican in disguise? According to this video, Lieberman used to support the Medicare expansion that is in the bill, but then again, he was for it before it was actually in the bill. Now he needs to be against it to continue his road blocking the bill, get his name in the news, and to support the Republicans, aka the party of no.


Friday, December 11, 2009

Tax the Babies

I've brought the subject up previously on this blog, about overpopulation being the root cause of our environmental problems. And that we need to place restrictions on the number of children people can have in this country. I was referring to China's one child per family law. On the Tree Hugger forum, someone posted an even better idea. Instead of restrictions, we tax additonal children.

"Currently if you have children you get a tax credit. I propose we change the system so that:

1 Child: You get a tax credit
2 Children: You now negate the first credit and get no credit at all
3. Children: You now pay a tax on the third child and so on...the tax burden gets higher the more kids you have.
Adoption: For every US child you adopt you get a tax credit"


Sounds good to me. And it's nice to see that I'm not the only one who feels we need to control population growth.

Wednesday, December 09, 2009

Alaska Oil Spill, and the News


In a little piece of news that isn't showing up all that heavily in the stories, an oil pipe in Alaska burst two weeks ago releasing 46,000 gallons of crude oil. The spill occurred in the Lisburne field just north of the Prudhoe Bay oil field. It was caused by too much pressure in the line, likely due to ice plugs. Instead of reporting on 46,000 gallons of oil seeping in the natural environment, the news over the past couple of weeks has been all about Tiger Woods. Instead of reporting on it like they did the Exxon Valdez, discussing the impacts and how long it will take to clean up, we hear about the never ending debate over healthcare, and see stories about the coolest presents this year. Do we blame the media for reporting nonsense rather than news, or do we blame the consumer for reading and watching the nonsense.

Here is a link to at least one article on this bit of actual news.
http://www.adn.com/money/industries/oil/prudhoe/story/1046914.html

Thursday, December 03, 2009

LSD War Games

And this kids is why you should never do acid before invading another country. I guess we now know why George Bush wanted to invade Iraq.