Chase Finally Cancelling a Canceled Account

I logged on this weekend to access my Chase mortgage and received an error:

You're unable to log on for one of these reasons:

• This website is temporarily unavailable
• Your User ID is invalid
• Your profile is locked

Along with a list of phone numbers to contact, depending on which service I am trying to access.

Knowing my user ID isn't invalid I decided to give it a day or two and give it another try, receiving the same error when I did. So the only logical conclusion is that my profile is locked for some reason. So, I call the number listed. I enter the automated validation information and sit on hold for a minute or two before the call is dropped.

I then call back and go through the same process, this time reaching a person. I explain my issue, and she transfers me to another department. Because, the online service department number was not one of the numbers listed in the 12 to choose from at the error page.

I enter my information again, select a few options, and get the next person. She verifies my address and other information before informing me that there was a business account associated to this account which has been deactivated. Which is true, there also was a personal checking account associated that has also been deactivated. Both of those accounts were closed a couple of years ago and can be read about here.

Anyway, she explains to me that they are going to need to set me up with a new online account and login, but first I need to verify some randomly selected questions.

• The first question: "Out of these names can you tell me which one you have gone by before…." Since only one was my actual name, that was an easy question to respond too.
• The Second question: "Which of these companies have you worked for…" With a lost of companies.
• The Third Question:  "Can you verify the age of Twila?"   (name I've never heard of) so I went with the non of the above option.

Luckily I guessed right answer to these lame-ass questions, completely unrelated to the questions I already answered.

And this is where she tells me, "now that I've verified that information, I will be conferencing in someone else. But before I do that, can I verify your address again?"

And on to the next person. "Thanks, can I have your first and last name?" After answering that, she asks me to verify my e-mail address. If there is one thing I can give them credit for, it's Keeping my account secure.

I explain that I want to access my account online again, and that I do not want a personal or business checking account again so they can remove that association. 20 minutes later I can access my account with the new login I now have to use.

Thanks Chase for finally deciding to break the association to my business account I canceled years ago, and not telling me until I tried to actually login to your website.

Disabled couple denied chance to live together by group homes

sent to me from FoxyNick

This is so wrong, why would they deny people this? I mean I can understand why disabled people are undesired people because at some point society deemed them undesirables, but some how they survived evolution. And they are here demanding rights, they are a community just like gay, lesbians, feminists, blacks, Jews, Catholics, etc... I have a few friends who are disabled and I don't see them as any less of a couple

Hava Samuels and Paul Forziano, who are mentally disabled, say the group homes where they live are blocking their request to live together as husband and wife. They are suing for the right to do so.

Ready the full story here...http://news.msn.com/us/disabled-couple-denied-chance-to-live-together-by-group-homes
 

The You Tube Party

I've notice this trend over the past couple of years, and maybe it started earlier and took me this long to notice, but it's a trend and it is lame. I call it the You Tube party. This is exactly how it works. A friend has a party or a little get together. We have a couple drinks, if there is food we eat, and we chat with one another. We see what's going on, tell stories, do whatever it is that people do when they get together in a group. Then, at some point someone will bring up a funny You Tube video. They will then pull up the You Tube video on a TV that has it built in, or pull out a laptop and start showing the supposedly funny video to people.  Think about it, how many parodies of Call Me Maybe have you seen at a party vs. the ones forwarded to you. After the first video is watched, it then leads to another video, and then to another and before you know it you have all just spent the rest of the evening staring at a screen watching stupid videos.

It has gotten to the point that I actually have gone to a friend's house, watched some video that he showed me, went over weeks later and he tries to show me the same fucking video. Seriously people! Get fucking lives! It is stupidity like this that convinces stupid people to video themselves being stupid and posting it on You Tube. So, if you want to sit around and stare a screen watching stupid crap, do it on your own time, and stop inviting me over to watch it. If I wanted to sit around watching stupid You Tube videos, I would do it when you forward one to me instead of deleting it like I do now.

Now go check out The Cranky Monkey on You Tube… Not really. I might have a stupid blog but for the time being, I don't have a stupid You Tube channel. And even if I eventually do start one, I won't force guests to my house to watch it. They can do it at night when they are crying themselves to sleep for being douche-bag.

John "The Gay Moralist" Corvino - Sodom and Gomorrah

Anger on a Plane

A post from occasional contributor FoxyNic

I don't always understand why I have the urges to be uncooperative or violent, perhaps It goes back to the animal instinct in me that just hasn't died out quite yet. Or perhaps it is in conjunction with lack of impulse control that follows anger issues. All I know is that there seems to be only two options, just accepting my fate or doing something about it. Now this is where it gets tricky; I could accept my fate and let the resentment built like the pressure behind a hose where the nozzle is off but the water its turned on full blast, this will most likely yield poor results as understood by how physics works eventually the pressure will become too much for the nozzle and blow shooting it off potentially maiming or even killing someone. Or the even more dangerous option: action. This only results in danger if the state of mind is in an irrational state. Although even rational people do irrational things. Sometimes I wish I had better control over how I responded to a situation. 

Case and point, here I am sitting on an airplane and after consuming a beverage in the morning to get me alert and able tolerate this four and a half hour flight, now at this point my bodily functions have alerted me that it is now time to void my bladder yet the flight attendant is currently passing out more beverages blocking the very narrow isle. This causes two problems for me; one, do I get up and use the restroom before they come possibly missing my chance to get a drink or do I wait until after they've passed by and I've finished my ginger ale? The rub here is that even after my drink is consumed; the process of handing them out takes much longer and now I am stuck to either wait as my bladder builds pressure and a possible infection ensues, or I can try my luck at using the first class lavatories. Unfortunately those are guarded just as tight at knox, which brings me to my inevitable irritation with the whole situation. Clearly first class passengers pay more for certain luxuries; larger seats, warm towels, better service, priority boarding, more room in general and closer lavatories. But why do they seem to get exclusive rights to the front lavatories, how many first class passengers are there in ratio to coach passengers; that's a lot more bladders and a lot more urine. So i sit here contemplating my options and i think about what might happen if i try my luck at the first class bathrooms; of prior experience, the stewardess will tell me i need to go back to my seat or try my luck with the rear bathrooms as these only for select passengers.

Now i wouldn't say i have a short fuse or that i am some kind of psychopath but after being put through the song and dance that is now our airport security, the fact that i have to bag up my tiny little bottles of "liquid", remove my shoes, pay extra to check my bag, and get visibly molested by full body scanners I'm definitely worse for the wear. Not to mention when i get to my gate instead of a nice civilized line its some hoard of people all trying to force their way on to the plane first, the so called order they try to apply to boarding gets lost as there are a million exceptions to the rules so that half of the passengers that weren't supposed to be seated are already on the plane taking up overhead storage space. Don't even get me started on the price gouging the comes mid air with internet access and horrible plane food that one can barely stomach in the first place at prices that would cause riots back on land. This all on top of my other neurosis in my life; am i going to do well at my new job, will i survive the weekend with my family, will i get any sleep with the time difference, what will become of my relationship.

However even after being called the weaker sex i can still manage to not to lose my shit, literally. Although the pressure on bladder is persistent and all i can imagine is throwing a fit in the front when the attendant refuses to let me pass; i imagine cussing at her and the front passengers exclaiming loudly about the unfairness and then popping a squat in the middle of the isle and pissing all over the shitty fabricated "carpet" feeling such a sense of vengeance and relief. The pure carnal satisfaction of relieving my bowels where i know it is wrong, yet so right. Now we all know per the world wide news from the breakdown of mental faculties in other individuals that this behavior would cause an immediate landing and most likely a spot on the no fly list. Since i like to travel, especially to see my family, i can only fantasize about this outburst in my mind. Smirking about how wonderful it would be to right a so ridiculous wrong with out the grave consequences to follow. 

Yet i continue to sit here typing away instead. This is my solace, instead of suffering in silence i let my imagination complete the horrid task the impulses in my primal brain, the ultimate offense and yet the most baser need of a human. Which is why i say no exclusive bathrooms, not in public buildings or restaurants and not in air planes. Though i don't have any control over my imagination and all the sick and twisted things that go dancing about in my brain i do however have some control of my body; besides the fact that i have to ask two people to move out of their seats before i can even reach the isle. So inevitably and rationally i wait with out complaint or snide remark for my seat and cell mate to get up and politely as ever used this opportunity to use the bathroom as well. Unfortunately to him this was an excuse to try and become chummy with me, and if you are like me the last thing on your mind is to have a meaningless conversation with some stranger that you'll never see again on a tin can with the words Alaska Airlines plastered on the outside. Especially when you feel as if your bladder is about to pop. So. Mr. Chatty and i make our way to the rear of the plane and wait in the accumulating line of people who also had to make that difficult decision to wait or not to wait.

They might be trying to engineer a new, cleaner, more streamlined bathroom for new planes and let me tell you it isn't happening soon enough. I suppose you'll have to pay more for a ticket to use those puppies too, as if this world isn't racking one large bill per person already. Soon it'll be like the movie the lorax where large corporations make bottled air a commodity and give ads men job advertising it to rubes. So i complete my business; relieved and ready to get out of the tiny stinking closet and trying to avoid getting get that nasty blue "liquid" on my pants, when i step out only to find the trash pickup cart heading my way and as i look around i realize there is no where for me to get around it. The result is realize myself and the four others who just wanted to get back to the cement block that is our seats have to stuff back into the sewer boxes to allow the cart to pass. So i curl back behind the door keeping is cracked slightly as not to plunge into complete darkness except to get by the stewardess with the cart has to forcibly shut my door to jam the damn thing by trapping me in the lavatory. If you can imagine the fear and disgust when faced with no escape from this flying disease trap and my urge to vomit was very strong in those seconds that felt like an hour. Finally free from the tiny hole i made my way back in line with the other sardines in row 22, praying to the diety of flight that i wouldn't have to use the bathroom again.

5 Broken Cameras

Each year the U.S. government provides roughly $2 billion dollars in military aid to the country of Israel.

Money used to shoot peaceful protesters and force people out of homes.
 
Trailer "5 Broken Cameras" from Guy Davidi on Vimeo.

If the people of this country and the government care so much about cutting the U.S. deficit, here is a quick way to cut a couple billion dollars for the deficit. 

Sequester Effect on the Military

I was skimming through the news and notice this headline from ABC news, "Most Back Cuts Overall – But Not to the Military". By a nearly 2 to 1 margin people are opposed to cutting the military budget in this country. Although, they did only poll about a thousand people. The people polled apparently support cutting, education, health benefits, and other social services but not the war machine.

With the sequester the department of defense will receive a roughly 8% reduction is spend equality $43 billion from defense programs.

To put that in prospective.

• The war in Iraq, according to the DOD totaled at least $757.8 billion. That doesn’t count cost of medical care for veterans, and the war in Afghanistan. Giving us over $1 billion per year of the war.
• As of 2007 there was an estimated $10 billion dollars lost through waste or mismanagement in the wars
• The United States plans to buy a total of 2,443 F-35 strike fighters at a cost of about $130 million per plane. And it doesn't even work and has never been used in combat.
• The military has 2 thousand tanks sitting on a base in Nevada that it doesn't even want and congress has forced them to buy. At roughly 8 million per tank.

Call me crazy, but I'm thinking, cutting a few broken planes and unwanted tanks from the military budget, isn't going to prevent us from fighting a war with every other country on the planet if we wanted.

Image Source

In fact, even with the budget cuts the military spending in this country is projected to increase every year along with the national deficit. 

Image Source

Worst TV Show Turned Movie List

I'm not going to add much commentary, I think these movies speak for themselves.

1. Miami Vice: I really don't expect much plot from a Michael Mann movie. In fact I expect mostly action. But Colin Farrell's greasy hair, and shitty acting was just wrong. Was this supposed to be an action flick, a thriller, or a comedy? Maybe if Mann had picked one it would have been a better movie, instead of just bad.
2. Starsky and Hutch: The show was a little before my time but watching Ben Stiller act like Ben Stiller in another Ben Stiller movie wasn't that interesting.
3. Dukes of Hazard: I didn't hate it, but I didn't love it either.
4. Lost in Space: Yes, this movie sucked. But honestly, the TV show kind of sucked as well.
5. Thunderbirds: I have intentionally avoided cartoons turned movies, such as Scooby Doo , GI Joe, and the Flintstones, as they pretty much always turn bad. But I have to mention the Thunderbirds, since it was puppets instead. So if you can't take a kids TV show involving puppets and make it a decent movie, you shouldn't be making movies.

I know there are more movies that should be on this list, and as I watch them, I will add them, so check back.

The Daily Show on McCain Hypocrisy

The Daily Show with Jon Stewart
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Seagull Eating a Plastic Bag

Something to think about next time you throw your trash out the window.

 

Let Me Off The Bus

The bus I usually take in the morning, is a nice double-decker, clean, and the passengers usually don't reek of B.O. as most are professionals like me, busing into the city for work.

The other day, I hit the button to get off at my stop. A stop that multiple people usually get off on. The bus comes to a stop, so I get up and go down the stairs. Another lady who was sitting on the top floor follows me down. As we get to the door the driver shuts it. I look at him:
Driver - You want off here?
Me - (looking back to the girl, then to the driver) that is why we walked down the stairs.
He opens the door.

Why am I writing about this? 1. because I haven't posted in a few days. 2. Because the bus driver was a impatient douche. 3. just because I was thinking of it, and am sitting in front of my computer

5 Simple Rules for Text Message Etiquette

1. If it is going to involve more than three responses, just call the person. It's a phone, use it as such
2. Texting is the only time you can use LOL, LMAO, TTYL, etc. all other times should be avoided, use your words. 
3. Don't text and drive. Whatever it is, it can wait, really. 
4. If a person doesn't respond right away don't freak out. Yes, this is a world of constant contact, but it is possible that the person is doing something and will reply later. Maybe they are on the phone, watching a movie, or taking a shit. 
5. Jokes don't always come through, unless you end the sentence with "joking". If it can be misinterpreted it probably will be.

My Online Pharmacy Experience

Like a lot of people these days I have a hard time sleeping. Sometimes, I might try my doctor for a Ambien prescription, which I'll take every once in a while when I am having a hard time sleeping. But thanks to the increase in prescription medication addicts out there, doctors are getting more stingy  to the rest of us, making it harder to get a prescription.

About a month ago, I decided to try one of the online pharmacies Bestrxpill4u.com. Sure the prices are higher than what I would pay with my insurance, but I don't take them that often and figured it was worth a try.

I placed my order, and supposedly to confirm the order, they needed to contact me, which involved giving them my number. They called, I confirmed the information and the prescription arrived. I studied the drugs to make sure they matched online images, so that I was sure I wasn't taking anything bad. I tried a half of one that night, and slept fine.

However, since then they have begun to harass me daily with phone calls trying to get me to buy more. They call at 7:03 AM and again at 7:04 AM, again at 11:00 and so forth and so on. They call so often, anytime I see the number, 1-800-340-6598 or 1-888-277-2060 on my phone I already know who it is. Yes, I've now memorized the 800 number just from seeing it so often. And I've started turning my phone on silent each night so it doesn't wake me up in the morning when they call.

It is unfortunate that they added me to the stalker call list, as I might have considered ordering from them again. But honestly, with the sketchy packaging, and drugs that could or could not be the real thing, and of course the harassing phone calls, I won't ever use them again, and would recommend the same for others. and have to give BestRXPill4U and negative review. 

Jefferson, Travel, and Happiness

In a letter to a family member, Thomas Jefferson wrote "travel makes you wiser if less happy." in the letter he goes on to expound on the value of travel yet how it wises one up to the world beyond our borders. Through the letter he encourages this family member to focus on education over travel here at home.

After a recent trip I've re-read this letter, and can relate very strongly to what he is saying. At home I work for a large corporation, I deal with other large corporations complaining, and over emphasizing their value, and how we need to cater to them. I deal with 2:00 AM phone calls because a CEO has nothing better to do with his time, and I deal with the term "fire drill" where someone important creates an issue where there doesn't need to be one.

On my overseas trip, however, I dealt with real issues. I saw orphans living in  small cement building, so crowded full of kids that each tiny little bed shared two kids.  I saw a country with an unemployment rate over 80%, compared to our 8% that we complain about here. I experienced police checkpoints, where cops pay their salary via the bribes they get at each stop. But most importantly, I saw people trying to improve the overall world we live in. People who were focused on saving wildlife on the brink of eradication. I met people from other countries who were there trying to make the world better, to have an experience that makes them better, and who cared about more than the bottom line of the corporate dollar.

Yet upon my return, I re-enter the surreal environment of my daily life. A life of repetition and exhaustion, where each day leads to the next with no break in between, and an answer to what I did on a Monday, is the same as a Wednesday or Friday, and on some days even a Saturday or Sunday.

I think Jefferson was witness to this on his travels as well, and when encouraging his nephew to stay at home and get a good education, he was also encouraging happiness in his nephew. They say ignorance is bliss, and it is true because through our own ignorance we don't realize how miserable we truly are.

Why Can't Women Cook Anymore?

Women's liberation, burning bras, equal pay for equal work, it was all supposed to make us equal. So, why is it that women can't cook anymore?

 Let me give you a couple of examples (not necessarily in order, or about the same person

Example 1:

Girl spends the night and decides to be nice by cooking breakfast. At first this sounds great, except she attempts to cook the hash browns in a pot used for boiling. The hash browns end up burning almost ruining the pot, and the house filled with smoke.  The hash browns came from a bag.

Example 2:

Girl lives next door to her parents. So instead of cooking for herself, she just walk over to her mother whenever she is hungry. Fully admits that she can't cook, and has no desire to learn how to cook. Not an issue until her mother passes away, or she moves to a location not next door.

Example 3:

Went out with  a girl and mentioned I liked open faced turkey sandwiches. So later on, to be nice she offers to cook me one. I gladly accept, not knowing she actually has no idea what one is. She shows up with some left over turkey and basically tries to make a regular turkey sandwich, just without putting the two halves together. 

Example 4:

This is more of an honest mistake, but funny enough to call it out here. A girl I was seeing, went to put a frozen pizza in the oven. A while later we go to check on it, and notice the smoke from underneath it, where she forgot to remove the cardboard from the underneath side of the wrapping.

Moving beyond the examples, in most relationships I'm in, I have a tendency to do most of the cooking. A good friend of mine, always does the cooking in his relationship. He is a good cook, so great, but still interesting to note that he does most of the cooking as do  I. now before I get a response from a bunch of angry women, this blog is about my experience and that I would say more than half the people in relationship I know, the men do most of the cooking. This doesn’t' mean, there are not plenty of women who also do cooking, and not that I am saying there is anything wrong with it,  but it is interesting to note the dynamic change over the years.  And it would be nice to get invited over for dinner and not have to pretend to like whatever the girl is cooking for me.

Chevy Volt, 12,000 Miles and 26 Gallons oif Gas

I'm not a fan of GM, or that much of a fan of the Chevy Volt. I do support the cause of electric vehicles over gas. So a story of a Chevy Volt owner driving 12,000 miles of 26 gallons of gas, it worth posting.

 Read the full story here...

NRA Response to Gun Restrictions

Image Source

Contrary to most of my left-leaning beliefs, I am in favor of an individual's right to own a firearm. And, with the recent shootings, I believe that we should focus on mental health over gun restrictions. Now having said that, their is nothing wrong with restrictions. We have restrictions on speech, and other amendments to the constitution. So why not the second amendment?

The NRA came out today in response to the Connecticut shootings, making statements that we need "armed security" in every school and "The only thing that stops a bad guy with a gun is a good guy with a gun." And, I'm sure to remind every politician out there, how much control they have over the political process. I've always been neutral on the NRA, but after this, I'm am now anti-NRA. I'm still for gun ownership, but can't support such stupidity in statements. So, instead of funding art and math, already underfunded schools should be paying security guards? According to one estimate about $18 billion dollars a year.

 It's interesting to note, that the right-wing, who always spouts off about individual rights, seems to also be associated to parties that are trying to turn this country into a Orwellian police state: Warrantless wiretapping, holding people in prison without trial, torture, and a cop on every corner. If they want to live in that type of world, maybe they should move. There are a few counties in the middle east already like that, I'm sure they will be happier there.

For now, how about a little dialog about gun restrictions and mental health at the same time. And not making dumbshit statements like, more guns are good. Especially considering, per capita, we have more gun violence than other first world countries.

Guns don't kill people, the person pulling the trigger does. The gun just makes it a lot easier.

Wild VS Zoo Elephant

Fox News Anchor Caught…

I go to Yahoo.com today and the top trending item is, "fox news anchor caught". So, of course I click on it, thinking, fox news anchor caught… in men's room at truck stop with under age hooker, or dead on toilet after brain aneurism, or choked on meatball sub, or admitting that fox news isn't actually news, or in dance club toilet with ounce of coke, or in bed with cross screaming "let Jesus fuck you." The list could go on as we have so many likely possibilities. Unfortunately, the top trending item on yahoo today, has to do with an anchor dancing to a song during a commercial break. BFD!

Thanks Yahoo for tricking me into clicking on the link, and thanks American, for being retarded and caring for this kind of crap.

Post Office Grammer

Standing in line at the post office the other day and noticed some less than steller grammer... Glad to know I'm not the only one.