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Sunday, February 26, 2012

Proof That The World Is Nuts!

This was forwarded to me in e-mail, so I couldn't tell you the original source. But it's pretty funny and appropriate for this blog, so enjoy.

In Lebanon, men are legally allowed to have sex with animals, but the animals must be female. Having sexual relations with a male animal is punishable by death.

(Like THAT makes sense!)

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In Bahrain, a male doctor may legally examine a woman's genitals, but is prohibited from looking directly at them during the examination. He may only see their reflection in a mirror.

(Do they look different in reverse?)

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Muslims are banned from looking at the genitals of a corpse. This also applies to undertakers. The sex organs of the deceased must be covered with a brick or piece of wood at all times.

(A brick?)

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The penalty for masturbation in Indonesia is decapitation.

(Much worse than "going blind!")

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There are men in Guam whose full-time job is to travel the countryside and deflower young virgins, who pay them for the privilege of having sex for the first time.

Reason: under Guam law, it is expressly forbidden for virgins to marry.

(Let's just think for a minute; is there any job anywhere else in the world that even comes close to this?)

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In Hong Kong, a betrayed wife is legally allowed to kill her adulterous husband, but may only do so with her bare hands.
No golf clubs....I hear a 3 iron works well.

The husband's illicit lover, on the other hand, may be killed in any manner desired.

(Ah! Justice!)

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Topless saleswomen are legal in Liverpool, England - but only in tropical fish stores.

(But of course!)

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In Cali, Colombia, a woman may only have sex with her husband, and the first time this happens, her mother must be in the room to witness the act.

(Makes one shudder at the thought!)

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In Santa Cruz, Bolivia, it is illegal for a man to have sex with a woman and her daughter at the same time.

(I presume this was a big enough problem that they had to pass this law?)

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In Maryland, it is illegal to sell condoms from vending machines with one exception: Prophylactics may be dispensed from a vending machine only in places where alcoholic beverages are sold for consumption on the premises.

(Is this a great country or what?)

(Well, not as great as Guam!)

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Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.

(Who volunteers for these tests?)

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The ant can lift 50 times its own weight, can pull 30 times its own weight and always falls over on its right side when intoxicated.

(From drinking little bottles of ???)

(Did our government pay for this research??)

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Butterflies taste with their feet.

(Ah, geez.)

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An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.

(I know some people like that.)

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Starfish don't have brains.

(I know some people like that, too.)
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And, the best for last?

Turtles can breathe through their butts.

(And I thought I had bad breath in the morning!)

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If you need to reach me in the future, I will be in Guam!!


Thursday, February 23, 2012

Washington State Republicans Love Santorum

With the Republican primaries working their way to Washington, Rick Santorum is surging over Romney. That's right, Republican voters in this state enjoy Santorum more and more.
Image Source

Read the latest here…


Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Teen Forces School to Remove Prayer, Religious Nuts Get Mad

"grant us each day the desire to do our best, to grow mentally and morally as well as physically, to be kind and helpful"

In a town in Rhode Island, a girl, and a few others felt this prayer this was excerpted from violated the constitution of the United States by not separating church and state. The court system agreed and asked that it be removed from the school it is painted on the wall in.

Personally, I could go either way on keeping it or removing it, what makes me cranky about this story, though, is that the religious right and conservatives in the town and around the country have started calling a 16 year old girl names, threatening her, refusing her service at stores, and basically doing everything that the religious in this country have become

Read all about it here.. http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/46160046/ns/us_news-the_new_york_times/

Tuesday, February 21, 2012

Sound Transit Reduced Route Ridiculousness

Image Source
As of yesterday, community/sound transit has revised a large number of routes. And by revised, I mean, canceled a large number of routes. One of the canceled routes is the 414 which I used to take. Instead of taking that, now I have to catch a bus at my park a ride, take it to another park and ride, transfer to a bus that is totally crammed full of people, and add about 20 minutes to my commute.

 
As usual, when they cancel routes they use the excuse of not enough money. I'm not sure how canceling routes helps though, as they are now not making money from those riders, and forcing people to use cars which increases congestion on the roads.

 
How about this sound transit! Three easy steps to gaining revenue instead of cutting costs:

 
  1. Fix the Orca card readers so that they consistently work and charge people.
  2. Get rid of the free ride zone in downtown Seattle. If someone wants to take the bus, they can pay for it.
  3. Start charging people to ride the South Lake Union Trolley and the Light Rail. Thousands of people rides these each day, and using the honor system for payments doesn't work. You would be creating jobs by having someone work the system to verify people are paying and have enough left over to bring back my bus route that was usually full.

 
If I get pulled over in my car without a seatbelt I'll get a ticket. Yet it is perfectly legal to cram a ton of people on a bus so that they are standing in the isles.

 

 

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Booty Call 101

booty and phone

For my valentines day post…

I found out this last weekend from a girls text at arranging a booty call with me, that not everyone knows the booty call rules. So, for those of you who are new to setting up booty calls, here are the basics to a booty call.

Out with friends, family, or just hanging out at home and you decide you would like to get some action? It used to involve a few phone calls, but thanks to text messaging you can pull out the phone and send a text message or two.

The message can be pretty short, such as: "Booty Call?" or, "Got plans for later?" or, "What you up to tonight, feel like some action?"

If the person you are sending it, doesn't already have plans or is interesting in the booty call, they will usually respond with a "yes" or "your place or mine." Although it is usually implied that the person out, or who initiated the booty call will go to the other persons place.

If the person does have plans or just wants to go to sleep, don't stress about it, just accept it and move on to the next person on the list.

Once the booty call has been arranged a quick text about what time should happen. If it won't be until really late, give the person the opportunity to back out, as they might not want to stay up late waiting. Or give them the option to leave the door unlocked and you can wake them up with your mouth in an appropriate area.

After the booty call has been setup, don't spend the rest of the night texting that person, or changing your mind back and forth about where, when, or if you might show or not. It's a booty call, not a complicated dating ritual by some birds in the Amazon.

  1. Booty Call?
  2. Your place or mine?
  3. What time?

And that's all there is to it.


Monday, February 13, 2012

Washington State Legalizes Gay Marriage

Washington State legalized gay marriage today, and big surprise the world didn't end and the state didn't fall into the ocean. In fact, doesn't really changed much at all except for gay people are now allowed the pleasure and misery of marriage, just like the rest of us.

Read more here…