Veep Drinking Game

Another Dead Tree

I was going to blog today about Mitt The Rat dropping out of the Republican race for president. But I think a simple "yippee skippy" Is all I need to say about that. Today, I've decided to tell a story. A story about a young man, and his visit to Sears.

Last weekend I went to the local Sears store to buy a couple of items. In fact I bought two items exactly, one of which was a pair of jeans. So, I was standing in line waiting to buy my items, when I noticed the person ringing people up, was taking this huge wad of receipts and putting it into each persons bag. When my turn arrives, she rings the stuff up and goes to print out my version of long receipt. So I make a comment about it. She tells me that it's mostly coupons. I don't say anything else about it and leave. After getting home I took my stuff out of the bag and laid out the receipt to see just how long it was. As you can see from the below image, it was about 4 feet long. The top section is the actual receipt, the next couple sections were return information, and the rest was coupons. All of this receipt including the coupons I promptly deposited into the recycling.

Lets take this into prospective. There are multiple checkout stands in each Sears location, then we multiply this by the total number of Sears stores, and this equals a lot of receipt tape. So I guess now we know who is the cause of deforestation!!! Come on stores, give people the option of saying no to the coupons. Save a fucking tree!

Now, back to the jeans. After getting home, I took the jeans out of the bag and began to remove all the stickers and tags, only to notice that the girl didn't bother to take off the security tag. You know the one, it's the type that has a plastic piece on each side connected by a thin wire. So that if you attempt to remove it, it will break and leak ink all over the article of clothing.

Some of you might be thinking "Big deal. So he had to go back to the store and have it removed." Those of you who know me, might be thinking, "What did he do? Did he go back and strangle the girl with the jeans?" Well no to both of those. Because yes, I probably would have had to bitch slap her if I went back, and so as to avoid that, I decided to get out the thin wire clippers and see if I could clip the wire. Which I did attempt to do, and failed at. So now, I'm stuck with a pair of new jeans and a nice little ink stain on the ass. So next time you pass me in the hall and notice an ink stain on my ass, no I didn't sit on a pin. I just really hate going to the store!!!


Rooster said…
I remember us talking about the receipt thing about this time last year!
Rooster said…
MGD said…
true, but you didn't have a picture of the receipt. That's why my post is better