Veep Drinking Game

Chase Finally Cancelling a Canceled Account

I logged on this weekend to access my Chase mortgage and received an error:

You're unable to log on for one of these reasons:

  • This website is temporarily unavailable
  • Your User ID is invalid
  • Your profile is locked

Along with a list of phone numbers to contact, depending on which service I am trying to access.

Knowing my user ID isn't invalid I decided to give it a day or two and give it another try, receiving the same error when I did. So the only logical conclusion is that my profile is locked for some reason. So, I call the number listed. I enter the automated validation information and sit on hold for a minute or two before the call is dropped.

I then call back and go through the same process, this time reaching a person. I explain my issue, and she transfers me to another department. Because, the online service department number was not one of the numbers listed in the 12 to choose from at the error page.

I enter my information again, select a few options, and get the next person. She verifies my address and other information before informing me that there was a business account associated to this account which has been deactivated. Which is true, there also was a personal checking account associated that has also been deactivated. Both of those accounts were closed a couple of years ago and can be read about here.

Anyway, she explains to me that they are going to need to set me up with a new online account and login, but first I need to verify some randomly selected questions.

  • The first question: "Out of these names can you tell me which one you have gone by before…." Since only one was my actual name, that was an easy question to respond too.
  • The Second question: "Which of these companies have you worked for…" With a lost of companies.
  • The Third Question:  "Can you verify the age of Twila?"   (name I've never heard of) so I went with the non of the above option.

Luckily I guessed right answer to these lame-ass questions, completely unrelated to the questions I already answered.

And this is where she tells me, "now that I've verified that information, I will be conferencing in someone else. But before I do that, can I verify your address again?"

And on to the next person. "Thanks, can I have your first and last name?" After answering that, she asks me to verify my e-mail address. If there is one thing I can give them credit for, it's Keeping my account secure.

I explain that I want to access my account online again, and that I do not want a personal or business checking account again so they can remove that association. 20 minutes later I can access my account with the new login I now have to use.

Thanks Chase for finally deciding to break the association to my business account I canceled years ago, and not telling me until I tried to actually login to your website.