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Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Post Office Genius

It's always been a toss up, as to which is worst the DMV or the Post Office. Yesterday, I decided the post office should move to the top of the list.

This last Sunday, I went to my local post office to mail two items. Both were in large envelopes. One was a disc of pictures in a CD case. This size and weight envelope, I've mailed a dozen times. The second was a video game, in an envelope a little larger than the first. I set each envelope individually on the automated postage machine, let it weigh, entered the delivery zip, and printed my stamps. The CD envelope actually cost more than the price I normally mail it at. I figured they must have raised the prices again, and didn't think much else of it. I dropped both envelopes in the box, with the paid stamps that were printed from the postal services machine.

Yesterday, I got home from work, went to check my mail, and both envelopes were in the box as return to sender due to not enough postage. Yes! That's right! According to the stamp on the front, I was 32cents short on each envelope. How the hell is this possible! I used their service, followed their instructions, and even paid more than I usually do, and still not enough money!!!!

I wanted to go down to the post office, but they were closed, so I decided just to add a stamp to each envelope, as the last time I was at the post office for another issue, it resulted in a physical brawl with the postal carrier and him loosing his job over it. This time though, it might have resulted in my arrest.

Any postal fuck-tards out there who read this blog, please feel free to comment and explain this to me, because I would love to know how this is possible. How is it that I could use your machine to print my stamp, and still not have enough postage!?!?!?!!?

Oh, and you punk kids out there, who vandalize peoples fences and personal houses. If you wouldn't mind re-directing that frustration at the postal service, I'd appreciate it.

Friday, July 25, 2008

I'm Fine Bitch, Back the Hell Off

Guys, do you ever get this from women, (because, it's usually women who do it) where they ask you "what's wrong," or "is everything okay," when everything is fine? And even if you tell them everything is fine, they still assume sometihng is wrong?

Let's say you are sitting at home and playing video games or surfing for porn on the computer, and a girl calls you up wanting to chat. Well obviously you don't want to chat, you are busy. But you don't want to say, "I'd rather play video games or look at hot Asian lesbians than talk to you, so instead, you just come across as aloof and non-talkative. The woman, just assumes something is wrong with you, and goes into chick mode trying to find out what and fix it.

How about the times you are hanging out with a girl, and you are tired from working extra hours, or whatever else is going on, you are not your usual happy-go-lucky entertaining self, and the woman picks up on your tiredness or even irritatedness, and assumes something is wrong. Instead of just leaving you alone or ignoring it, they dive in with, "what's wrong? You seem different today, what's the matter?"

Have you ever not called a girl back right away, and she assumes there is some hidden meaning behind it? How about this for a reason, "I was busy bitch!"

Have you ever been walking down the hall and pass someone and they say, "how's it going?" okay, guys do this one as well. But this is still irritating so I decided to bring it up here. When asked, you always say, "fine" or "okay". How nice would it be to go into a long rant about some total nonsense and teach the person a lesson never to do that again.

What I'm trying to say here ladies, and the occasional dude, is if something is the matter, and we feel it's something you need to know about odds are that we will tell you. So back the hell off!

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Microsoft Finally Goes Green


A while back, I posted "Earth Day and Microsoft" about Microsoft using Styrofoam cups and plates. About a month ago, Microsoft finally decided to upgrade everything to more environmentally friendly products. They removed the Styrofoam waste containers and replaced them with ones for compostable products. They also removed the various boxes for paper, and replaced them with just one recyclable container. They also replaced all the Styrofoam products with paper products. They even replaced the plastic utensils with ones that can be thrown in the compost disposal. How Fab!

It's nice that Microsoft is finally deciding to lean towards more environmentally products. It's also nice how they realized most of the employees are to clueless to figure it out on their own by reading the sides of the containers. And they posted flyers all over the place. Printed, posters, and all kind of other labels that they've stuck all over the office, so the typical MS employee can figure out where to throw away stuff now.

Thursday, July 17, 2008

Motorcycle to Work

Yesterday was national ride your motorcycle to work day, or at least that's what someone told me. Just like national don't buy gas day, or national finger up your butt day, I could really care less. If I'm going to ride to work, I'm going to ride to work. If not, then not.

As I was riding to work, there was a larger than usual backup in the regular lanes. So, I'm actually enjoying cruising along past them in the express lane. That is, until, the express lane becomes backed up. And it slows down to the point that there is only one reason for such a back up… an accident. In the center lane was a car, with a motorcycle smashed up behind it, and a police car behind that. No one appeared to be injured, the motorcyclist was standing and talking to the other driver. From the looks of what happened, the motorcyclist hit the guy in the car. A good day for him to be riding to work.

The implication in these situations, is usually when a car and motorcycle get in a wreck, it's the cars fault. That some jackass, is talking on the cell phone, putting on makeup, reading a magazine, or just plain and simply not paying attention. And it's true, many accidents are caused by this. The fact that they are hitting a motorcycle, doesn't play into effect as much as it's that they are dumbasses not watching what they are doing. I drive a Toyota pickup and have had people almost hit me from not paying attention on numerous occasions. I even had a person rear end me once, while I was parked at the gas station filling up. They pulled in, and drove right up to the back of my truck as if it weren't there. Which is one reason I have a trailer hitch on the back, instead of hurting my truck, they put a nice little ding in the front of their car.

Anyway - To get back to the point, I would imagine that many of the accidents involving motorcyclist are actually caused by the person on the bike. How many times have we seen someone racing back and forth weaving in and out of cars on the highway? I know I've seen it more than once. So I decided to do a little research on the subject.

- Helmet use among fatally injured motorcyclists below 50 percent
- High blood alcohol levels are a major problem among motorcycle operators
- Half of the fatalities are related to negotiating a curve prior to the crash
- Over 80 percent of the fatalities occur off roadway
- Almost two thirds of the fatalities were associated with speeding as an operator contributing factor in the crash (In 1998, 41% of all motorcycle drivers involved in fatal crashes were speeding.)
- Collision with a fixed object is a significant factor in over half of the fatalities
- Braking and steering maneuvers possibly contribute for almost 25 percent of the fatalities
- Almost one third of the fatally injured operators did not have a proper license

To those of you out there who always feel the need to make some "oh that’s dangerous" comment about riding, look at the numbers… If a person on a motorcycle doesn't ride like a dumbass, they already are reducing the risk of getting in an accident by that amount.

So why you are driving home in your nice safe minivan or SUV, to sit and watch TV with the kids, drinking yourself to sleep, because you realized you are a middle aged corporate drone with no life, remembering the good old days before marriage and children, some of us will be cruising on past in the express lane, on our way out to live a little…

Resources:
http://www.webbikeworld.com/Motorcycle-Safety/809-360.pdf

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

The Draining Drain Drains

On July 8th the drain pipe of the 3rd floor break room sink, here at Microsoft land. When walking into the break room, people were confronted by a large puddle of dirty water and yellow "wet floor" cones. Most people ignored the leaking drain and continued to use it, only contributing to the puddle on the floor, knowing that someone else would be responsible for cleaning up the mess. Eventually someone did clean up the mess, and tape off the sink in order to stop the typical Microsoft employee from using it.

The next day, July 9th, the plumber ordered the replacement parts, and added a note that the parts had been ordered.

July 15th, we still have a sign that the parts have been ordered, and a sink that does not work…

How the hell does it take so long to get parts to fix a drain? It's two pipes fitted together. I had a faucet in my house from 1980 that they don't even make any more. A trip to an actual plumbing store and it was fixed that day. Yet because this is the Microsoft contracted plumber, they probably have forms to fill out, and specific companies to order through. So now, the people who work here can't use the sink because we are waiting on a part to arrive for eastern Russia somewhere, because the plumber couldn't run down to the local hardware store.


7/16/08 Update: I went into the break room yesterday and someone had taken the time to type and print a few words, then taped it to the sync. Today I had my camera with my, and was planning on taking a picture of it, but in-between then and now, someone took the document down. I'll try to paraphrase from memory, " Actually this sync was broken on the 7th not the 9th, and my 80 year old grandmother could fix a sync in less time with parts purchased down at the Home Depot." it had a couple other choice sentences as well. Hopefully they will repost it and I can get that picture.

Thursday, July 10, 2008

Vote for Meritocracy

I thought I posted this a couple of weeks ago, but apparently not.

My buddy over at Eccentri City (EC) and I were having a conversation about the sad state of our political system. During the discussion, I pointed to the Democratic primary as an example. When they were breaking down who voted for who, there was a trend. Most of the Clinton voters were lower to middle class and less educated. Most of the Obama voters were better educated and more affluent. As in, the same type of people who voted for George Bush, were voting for Hillary.

The point I was making to EC, is, do we really want the less educated, poor assed, not as bright people actually making the decision as to who should be president? My opinion is of course not, we have 8 years of proof of what happens when you vote for the person you'd rather have a beer with.

EC responded with that's why we need a system based more on meritocracy. For those of you who don't know, as per dictionary.com meritocracy is "an elite group of people whose progress is based on ability and talent rather than on class privilege or wealth."

EC's idea is that the voters use this in adjusting how their vote counts. Currently, it's one vote per person. Under EC's system you get points for achievements in your life. For Example: You get a point for military service, a half point for an Associates degree, and a full point for a bachelors. What you do for a living should also play into effect. The college professor should get potentially 2 points as compared to a corporate office monkey like myself, who only gets 1, to the Wal-Mart employee who gets no additional points. If you are a welfare mother with 5 kids, you actually loose a point.

Personally I think it's a pretty good idea. It makes sense that the person who is potentially more knowledgeable on the subject have more say in it.

Tuesday, July 08, 2008

Seattle 20 Cent Bag Fee

I added a comment to the bottom of the last post, but I wanted to remind everyone that tonight is the night to protest the Seattle City Councils desire to make money off the typical grocery store shopper.
There are two issues for debate tonight:

Banning Styrofoam - This is an easy sell to the public, which is why they are trying to tie it in with the other. They are assuming we are stupid, (and unfortunately most are) and that since we hate Styrofoam we will agree to the other in association. But it is possible for them to ban this separate.

Adding a 20 cent charge to grocery bags- This is the more important issue, and should be protested like the Vietnam War. Yes, plastic bags are spoiling the oceans, and filling the dumps, and flying around all over the place. But a 20 cent fee is not the right solution. What it is, is the city trying to make money off the problem.
  • They say this will reduce the amount of bags thrown away by 50%. Yet they have no information as to how they came to that number. First of all, many people re-use these bags. Many people use them as garbage bags, so if they can't get the free ones, they will buy plastic garbage bags. So instead of grocery store bags going into the dump, bought bags are going to the dump.
  • Second, many people with pets use these for picking up poo. Some people are cheep and might not pick it up at all now. This will increase the poo being left where it shouldn't, and give good dog people a bad rep, and result in dogs being allowed in even less places than they currently are.
  • This leads to my next point. Little dog poo bags are biodegradable. Which means, it is possible to make a biodegradable bag that stores could use. Why doesn’t the city pass a law requiring stores to use them instead?!?!?!
  • Finally, plastic bags ARE recyclable. The city and these left wing nuts, are acting like these bags are destroying the planet. At last I heard the city of Seattle recycles 40% of its garbage. But the average plastic bag only gets recycled 1% of the time. what's the reason for this? people are lazy, that's why. If the city council really cared about this problem, they could very easily require that the curb side recycling take plastic bags along with the rest of the recycling. More people will be inclined to throw the bags into the big blue container, instead of making the effort to store them till the next shopping trip.

Thursday, July 03, 2008

Helmet Law

This was sent by one of my cranky readers.

Contrary to what you know it all bicyclist believe, there is no federal U.S. law that requires you to wear a helmet while riding a bike. So keep your fucking comments to yourself.

I was out with my kids on the Burke Gillman trail last wed. and everyone felt the need to yell at me for not making my kids wear a helmet. My daughter who is 6 and was riding a training wheel bike did have a helmet but the strap broke so we left it in the car. Plus she can't go faster than 2 miles and hour and sits so low to the ground even if she did fall it would be impossible to hurt herself. My son had his helmet most of the time on put his is to small and was pinching his neck. He too was going very slow cause we were always waiting for his sister to catch up. So next time you feel the need to criticize maybe you should get all the information first or even better mind your own Fucking business.



I couldn't agree more with this person. Most everyone in this country grew up not wearing a helmet and somehow we managed to survive. If I were this person, and was out with my children, and someone said something like that to me, I probably would have pushed them over on their bike, and starting kicking them as they cried on the ground, like the little bitches they are.

I also want to add one correction. It's true we don't have a national or state law requiring helmets, but some counties and cities do require helmets. Although I don't recall ever seeing it up for a vote.

Here is the link to Washington State Bicycling laws. And unfortunately King and Snohomish counties are included.

For those Seattle residents complaining about stupid laws. Tuesday July 8th at 7:00 the Seattle City Council is holding a hearing about adding a 20 cent charge, to every paper and plastic bag you use at the grocery store. If you don't complain now, you will when this is passed. It doesn't solve the problem, it only allows the city to make money off it.

Good Riddance

Finally, they will stop talking about the Sonics in Seattle. Okay, that might have been optimistic. Finally, they will stop talking about the Sonics so damn much in Seattle! The new owner and the city of Seattle have come to an agreement, and one of the lamest teams in the NBA is going away. Seattle is going to get a big pile of cash, and the team is going to move somewhere that people might actually go to the games. Now only if they would take a few of the lame-ass Seattle drivers with them.

Full Story on the Seattle PI

Tuesday, July 01, 2008

I'll Buy That

Ever heard the saying, "money doesn't buy happiness," a saying usually uttered by people trying to make themselves feel better about not having any money? Ever notice how unhappy guys look while cruising down the road in their Porsche, or on their jet ski?

Money does buy happiness. And thanks to a new study on the most happy countries, it's been measured. "The new survey finds people of rich countries tend to be happier than those of poor countries." click here to read more, and quite trying to make yourself feel better about being poor, and update your saying to "Coors light buys happiness."