Showing posts from 2009

Men vs. Women Cooking

Check out the Cranky Monkey of Facebook to participate in a discussion on who cooks more and better, men or women.

Top 10 Things from 2009 that I Don't Care About

As the year rolls to a close, these are my top ten items from 2009 that received way to much time in the press and I really don't give a crap about. 10. H1N1 Swine Flue Vaccine - This is a holdover from 2008, but once the vaccine came out, it's all they talked about. Who's getting it? who is not getting it? Does it work? What's the dosage? And of course, how much is being made? Please people! There are so many other things that you are more likely to get, and are much worse for you. Fucking mindless sheep!
9. Boeing 787 Dreamliner - This is a little more local than national, but living in Seattle, it's been impossible to turn on the news, or read the local papers without headlines of the 787. The plane is two years behind schedule and finally flew. That's nice, can we now talk about something else Seattle.
8. The White House Party Crashers - AKA the Salahi's. These people were looking for a little fame, they did it by crashing a white house party, and guess …

My Kind of Santa

Here you go, my annual Christmas post. No top 10 list this year, no poem, and no prose. This year, you get a picture copied from another site… enjoy and merry fucking Christmas.

Climate Change Deal

To commemorate the less than ideal outcome from the climate talks in Copenhagen last week.

Them, Me, and the Beer on Tap

As I sit in the bar looking at the people around me, I think to myself at what point do I go from a person who is hanging out with his friends while drinking at the bar during the week, to the guy who is sitting at the bar by himself drinking because he doesn't want to drink at home alone. As if somehow doing it at the bar makes it okay. I'm not alone, I'll be meeting up with friend as the night wears on, I am just the first person to arrive. A few years earlier I might have felt a little uncomfortable at the counter, drinking my IPA and watching the TV above, while crowded tables laughed and joked around me. Yet I notice this night, as I look to the other individuals sitting at the bar, that it's not as uncomfortable as I once thought. How long will it be till the bartenders know my name? How long till I'm one of the guys next to me, who feels perfectly comfortable in the barstool, eating the deep fried or grilled food, and knows exactly what the bar tab will come…

Extra Time, Vicodin, and a Proper Balance of Both

As I lay on the floor, absorbing the effect of the Vicodin I just took, hoping to kill my back pain from sitting at a desk all day; I begin to wonder what makes the artist, musicians, and creative people different from the rest of the world. What makes Vincent van Gogh different from Bill Gates. Why is it Beethoven can create beautiful music, yet the douche bag who sits in the office next to me can’t even hum the Jeopardy theme in proper tune. And thanks to the nausea that goes along with Vicodin, why is it creative people are more prone to alcohol and drug abuse? Jimi Hendrix, a self taught guitarist, used to drop acid before going on stage, and he’s considered one of the greatest rock musicians of all time.

This got me thinking about left brain and right brain people. They say left brain people tend to be more logical and analytical, while right brain people have a more subjective view of the world. I’ve always considered myself a right brain person. I used to do theatre, I paint and…

Lieberman - Democrat > Independent > Republican

Joe Lieberman should just come out and declare himself a Republican. The congressman from Connecticut at one point in time was a Democrat. That was until his own party decided that he didn't belong, and put an actual Democrat up for election in his state. Unfortunately Lieberman ran as an independent and won. Now, the Democrats are being forced to cater to him in order to get the necessary votes to pass healthcare reform in the senate.

Joe Lieberman has decided to make himself a roadblock to legislation. First he was against the public option, and now he's against expanding Medicare. What he's really against is this bill. Is he bitter about the lack of party support, or is he just a Republican in disguise? According to this video, Lieberman used to support the Medicare expansion that is in the bill, but then again, he was for it before it was actually in the bill. Now he needs to be against it to continue his road blocking the bill, get his name in the news, and to support …

Tax the Babies

I've brought the subject up previously on this blog, about overpopulation being the root cause of our environmental problems. And that we need to place restrictions on the number of children people can have in this country. I was referring to China's one child per family law. On the Tree Hugger forum, someone posted an even better idea. Instead of restrictions, we tax additonal children.

"Currently if you have children you get a tax credit. I propose we change the system so that:

1 Child: You get a tax credit
2 Children: You now negate the first credit and get no credit at all
3. Children: You now pay a tax on the third child and so on...the tax burden gets higher the more kids you have.
Adoption: For every US child you adopt you get a tax credit"

Sounds good to me. And it's nice to see that I'm not the only one who feels we need to control population growth.

Alaska Oil Spill, and the News

In a little piece of news that isn't showing up all that heavily in the stories, an oil pipe in Alaska burst two weeks ago releasing 46,000 gallons of crude oil. The spill occurred in the Lisburne field just north of the Prudhoe Bay oil field. It was caused by too much pressure in the line, likely due to ice plugs. Instead of reporting on 46,000 gallons of oil seeping in the natural environment, the news over the past couple of weeks has been all about Tiger Woods. Instead of reporting on it like they did the Exxon Valdez, discussing the impacts and how long it will take to clean up, we hear about the never ending debate over healthcare, and see stories about the coolest presents this year. Do we blame the media for reporting nonsense rather than news, or do we blame the consumer for reading and watching the nonsense.

Here is a link to at least one article on this bit of actual news.

Proof That Girls Are Evil


LSD War Games

And this kids is why you should never do acid before invading another country. I guess we now know why George Bush wanted to invade Iraq.

Twilight Moms


Help Ban Divorce in California

Protect the sanctity of marriage and help ban divorce in Californian! Voters last fall repealed gay marriage in the state, wanting to protect traditional marriage. All prop 8 did was prevent gays and lesbians from getting married, but for the true believers, to protect traditional marriage we should ban divorce all together. After all, the vow does say "till death do us part."

A group of concerned citizens is trying to get on the ballot in California for 2010 the California Protection of Marriage Act. If you are a California resident, then please sign the petition and support the cause. Because after all, if gays can't get married for tradition, straight people shouldn't be allowed to divorce for the same reason.

Visit Rescue Marriage for more information or to support the cause.

Cranky for Palin

As you may have noticed there are strategically located ads on this blog. It was pointed out by a friend yesterday, that my left leaning anti-Palin commentary didn't trigger Goggles' adSense relevancy filter, and an add for her posted on the site.

Ahhh, good stuff that Palin book.

Dual Flush‏

Another good one from my boy Eccentri City

So I am sitting on the crapper in one of our work buildings and I look over to find this sign:

Then I think, this would be a great thing in the lady’s room. But for the masculine excremental unit, unless males are increasingly peeing like girls (which wouldn’t surprise me where we work), what value would this have? Liquid waste goes to the self NON-flushing green urinals for the most part. If I only had to expunge liquid waste, I wouldn’t even be in this stall.

Oh well. If they ever decide to swap rooms at least they will be prepared.

Louisiana and Arkansas Democrats, Get Off Your Asses

I would imagine I don’t have many readers from Arkansas and Louisiana, but if you are from one of those states, and you do read this blog, e-mail or call your representatives to the US Senate and tell them to allow the heath bill to go up for debate. The vote they are wavering on isn’t a vote to support or approve the heath bill before them. All the vote is, is to allow it to be debated. They can then try to make changes to the bill, but that can’t be done until it’s up for discussion.

In Arkansas contact Blanche Lincoln -here
In Louisiana contact Mary Landrieu -here

The bill is designed to rein in costs, expand coverage and bar industry practices like denying coverage to those with pre-existing conditions.

Republicans (The party of No) don’t support the bill because it’s proposed by Democrats. But Democrats should at least support the concept of allowing the bill to be debated, amended, and voted on.

A New Ad from Plane Stupid

Living in a country without bullet trains, we are forced to fly for most all of our travel. Here's a video to give you something to think about.

Polar Bear from Plane Stupid on Vimeo.

Our Lives are a Dilbert Cartoon

Sent from a cranky co-worker.

My life is a Dilbert cartoon ~ Eccentri City
So, Cranky and I work at the same place and I forwarded this for “collaborative analysis”.

15 Signs Your Workplace Is Dysfunctional

We were surprised to find out that, there is not ONE of the 15 signs that does not apply. We thought we could cratch off at least a few. Surely it isn’t that egregious. But alas, each of the 15 signs is prevalent. Here’s how it goes down with each in our workplace:

Sign No. 1: Conspicuously posted vision or value statements are filled with vague but important-sounding words like "excellence" and "quality."

Here’s out team’s mission statement:
“We lead and execute programs to ensure [our business’] sales, service and support teams are “business ready” for products and services by:
· Seeing the road ahead
· Role call
· Manage Whales and Fish
· Build our strengths”
“Business ready”? Sounds nice and vague. I know for a fact we can hardly see an inch in front of us let alone the…

Why Pot Hasn't Been Legalized

This was forwarded to me from a friend, and seemed as good as anything for today's post.

How Working for Microsoft as a "V-" or "A-" Is Like Being Black In The 50's

One of the joys of working for Microsoft as a vender or contractor is you are not a full time employee, which of course means you are treated as such by the full time employees.

Every employee/vender/contractor is provided a badge. The badge has a picture of the person. The badge is used for many purposes such as entering the building and security. It is to be warn and visible at all times. For venders and contractors it's orange. For FTE's it's blue. You are either a blue badge or an orange badge, so know your place.

The company store is one the perks Microsoft provides it's employees. An orange badge will allow you into the store, you just aren't allowed to purchase anything once there. Unless you are friends with a blue badge and can talk them into it.

Microsoft provides it's own bus service called the Connector. The service picks up at select locations around King and Snohomish county. This provides employees a ride to work on a bus with WiFi and the ability t…

The Joys of Wolf Hunting

Dead mother, live pup? Maybe

So proud of himself for shooting such a large animal with a high powered rifle, scope, and plenty of distance.

I’m a Republican!?!?

I’m not sure how it happened but somewhere, somehow my name was added to the Washington state Republican voters list. Yep, that’s right folks; the Cranky Monkey is a Republican. Who would have thought?

As a registered Republican they sent me a questionnaire about the state of the Republican Party asking for feedback. Followed up of course by an ask for a donation.

What I found interesting is the way the questions were worded, worded in a way to elicit the response that they wanted to hear. I generally disagree with the Republican Party on most all issues, yet had to fight the urge to agree with them on the way they were worded. I can see how the old, easily influenced, and general population of this country might agree with them.
For example:
“Do you oppose the Obama-Pelosi heath care takeover plan that would bring Washington bureaucrats between doctors and patients, ration medical treatment, and deny critical care while skyrocketing the national debt.” Wow! How could I respond to that, i…

Coal Country

Not a huge issue here in the North West but interesting to think how we will continue to destroy our environment in our never ending need to consume.

See it in theaters or get the DVD for Coal Country

What Would Jesus Think of the Healthcare Debate

As we've seen in the news and read online quite a bit lately, there have been protests all across this country over recent months, against the democrats attempt at healthcare reform. One of the interesting things about these protesters is they identify themselves as patriots and Christians. The NY Times recently had an article about one of the protests, no different from any other article on the subject. After reading it, I scrolled down to the comments section and read this one from someone referencing the bible.

Then Jesus will turn to those on His left hand and say, “Depart from me because I was hungry and you did not feed me, I was thirsty and you did not give me to drink, I was sick and you did not visit me.” These will ask Him, “When did we see You hungry, or thirsty or sick and did not come to Your help?” And Jesus will answer them, “Whatever you neglected to do unto one of these least of these, you neglected to do unto Me!”

I think if Jesus were alive today he would not be v…

Times They are a Changin… for Marijuana

In a sign that this country is loosening it’s collective panties on marijuana: In the elections held last night, two more places that had marijuana law changes on the ballot voted in favor of the ganja.

- Breckenridge Colorado, voted to allow adults to legally possess small amounts of marijuana
- Maine approved dispensaries to supply marijuana to patients for medicinal purposes. A follow-up to a 1999 measure that legalized medical marijuana but did not set up a distribution system.

Not to mention the Obama administration announcing recently that they are going to stop going after marijuana dispensers in states that have legalized its use.

Teaching Gay

On this election day, I love how the moral majority always uses scare attics to get people to vote their way. I also love how the sheep in this country seem easily fall for it.

Check out this video for example, it's pretty clear. If we allow gay marriage, they are going to teach being gay to kids, and your children will become gay. So vote no if you don't way gay children.

And now notice the pro-gay marriage video. No scare tactics, no ant-straight commentary, just hey let's treat everyone as equals.

Being gay isn't a choice. Come on, would any really willing choose to be ridiculed by society, live in fear or attack in the red states, choose to have their family disown them. No! and no, teachers aren't going to suddenly start teaching gay to children. Hopefully the only thing they will teach is tolerance.

Denied Insurance After Rape

As if being raped isn't a traumatic enough experience, this woman had her insurance dropped for it as a pre-existing condition. Basically, since she was in therapy and taking anti-HIV medications, they wouldn't provide her coverage.

As the debate goes on over healthcare reform, and the conservatives protest the idea of changing the status quo, I wonder how many of them would participate in those protests if this had happened to them.

Job Satisfaction vs. Money

A coworker of mine and I have been having this conversation lately about jobs, money, and job satisfaction. We both acknowledge that we make good money at our current jobs, and the work isn't that hard, yet our job satisfaction is pretty low. We've also talked about jobs that we really enjoyed, yet paid low wages. He sent me this diagram as proof in point.

One of my favorite jobs involved working in a pizza joint. I basically lived off pizza and tips, but my co-workers were awesome, we had lots of fun, and political correctness never entered into our interactions with each other.

Songs That Make Me Wish I Were Def

Sometimes a band comes out with a song that sucks so much, in some cases it makes me usually end up not liking any of their music, or in more extreme situations makes me want shove a pencil in my ears to stop the pain of listening to that song.

Pearl Jam - Last Kiss (remake): I know living in Seattle that I'm supposed to love Pearl Jam, but come on, Eddie Vedder singing Last Kiss makes me wish I were the dead girl in the car.

Del Amitri - Roll to Me: This song made it to the top 10 list back in 1995 and has haunted me ever since. If you don't know what I'm talking about, listen to a clip on Amazon and this song might make you want to go on a shooting spree as well.

Bryan Adams- Have You Ever Really Loved a Woman: the them song for Don Juan DeMarco, and when it came out there was nowhere I could go that wasn't playing it: malls, grocery stores, the radio on most all pop stations, my college campus, and in my nightmares.

Dave Matthews Band- Too Much: you know what is too mu…

Karma, Bad Weather, and the South East

So there is such a thing as Karma: Oxfam America has recently published an interactive map of states within the U.S. most likely to be effected by global warming. The states most likely to feel the effects are populated by the people least likely to believe in human caused climate change.

"The intensity of Atlantic hurricanes is likely to increase during this century wit higher peak wind speeds, rainfall intensity, and storm surge height and strength"

"The number of freezing days in the Southeast has declined by 4 to 7 days per year since the mid 1970's"

"The home state of our last two republican presidents will be heavily hit by high levels of drought.
The intergovernmental panelt on climate changes estimates average temperatures in Texas could rise by about 5.85 degrees by 2100 ad the current rate of global warming."

Since most of the south doesn't believe in global warming, I guess the only other explanation is God must be pissed at you about somet…

Yes on REF.71

I haven't posted much on this Novembers ballot measures or officials running for office, so to help support my cock sucking and pussy licking friends out there, here you go…

Vote yes, it is the morally and socially right thing to do.

Scary Stories About Climate Change

The British Department of Energy and Climate Change recently launched an add with the intent of warning about climate change, and hopefully scaring people a little into doing something about it. Of course people and their never ending need to freak out about things, are freaking out about the ad is scaring children.

I wouldn't say this is scary, in fact I'd say it was well done. But then again, I'm one of those crazy people who actually believe in global warming and the negative impact humans are having on this planet, and the need to do something about it.

Farmers Grow Hemp on DEA Lawn

Yesterday the Obama administration announced that the national government will stop interfering with states rights to legalize medicinal marijuana. With the government beginning to realize that marijuana is hardly a drug that should be prosecuted, some hemp farmers decided to plant some hemp seeds on the from lawn of the DEA. For those that don't know, it's not legal to grow hemp in the U.S. yet the government allows us to import hemp from other countries.

Facebook Lists

As much as I hate social networking sites such as Facebook. I will say that one fun thing fun to do is categorize the random people who friend me on Facebook. Not that I care much about grouping the miscellaneous people I know on the site, but a friend showed me his GILF (Girls I'd Like to Fuck) list, which got me thinking that I should create a few lists of my own. Besides the GILF list, the second one I could create would be the GIHF (Girls I Have Fucked) list, followed up by the GIFD (Girls I'd Fuck Drunk) list. and of course the GINF (Girls I'd Never Fuck) list. the final list I came up with has nothing to do with fucking, it's the RPWFMOFBINAFW (Random People Who Friended Me on Facebook But I'm Not Actually Friends With) list. This unfortunately is where most of my Facebook "friends" would get grouped.

No Help From a Monkey

This is why you should never ask a Monkey to do nice things for people.

My friend who blogs over at Seattle Feeze sent me an e-mail about this, “cool event I'm attending in two weeks that I thought you might want to join me for. Global Trauma Intervention.” An event to help trauma victims in India. Because we’re friends and she obviously knows how much I love helping people.

After checking out the link, and noticing that it’s being held on a Friday night at a church, I respond with a simple, “it's held at a church” knowing that she also knows my love of the cloth and being preached at.

At which point the e-mail turned into an IM conversation.

SF: Didn't notice that. Shit. So...that's a no?

CM: My concern would be bursting into a ball of flame if I ever walked into a church. Will there be booze provided?

SF: haha. I don't know. Hold on.

CM: And how much money are they going to ask me to donate?

SF: I don't think it's like that. No drinks, just dessert. I think.


Razor Clams are Edible This Year, But at What Cost

It's Blog Action Day today, and in honor of that I'm going to talk about Razor Clam digging tomorrow.

Along the Washington State coast each year, people come out in droves with buckets and shovels in hand to participate in the Razor clam digs. The Washington Department of Fish and Wildlife (WDFW) has completed testing the clams, and approved the digs at five beaches after a series of marine toxin tests confirmed the clams were safe to eat. Evening digs are scheduled at Twin Harbors (Oct. 16-19); Long Beach and Copalis (Oct. 16, 17 and 18); and Mocrocks and Kalaloch Beach (Oct. 17 and 18) according to the wdfw website.

It's interesting to note, that in the world we live in these days, we have to add restrictions on the number clams being dug so as not to deplete the stock, as we would eat every edible plant, animal, and fish to extinction if not for these restrictions. It's also interesting to note, that even in this day and age of EPA, people going "green", and…

Ice Melt in the Arctic

An interesting video on NASA's studying of the decreasing ice in the arctic and it's effects on the planet.

Deuteronomy 22:13-21

Found this picture on the Huffington post. Thought it was a pretty interesting statement to the hypocrisy of the religious right and moral majority who are against gay marriage as per their belief in the bible.

Here's a like to the full passage.

Drive-Tard Tips

Some helpful tips for the typical drive-tard out on the roads.

The turn signal is to the left of the steering column. Click it up when turning right, click it down when turning left. The turn signal activates lights on each corner of the car that flash and notify other drivers your intent to turn or change lanes. Once the turn/lane change is complete, be sure that the flashing light in your dashboard has turned off. If it hasn't use the same switch to de-activate it.

We know that you are paranoid about hitting another car, but continually tapping the break is irritating. It also causes the person behind you to do the same, and in turn, it slows down the overall flow of traffic. If you are worried about hitting the car in front of you, don't ride the ass of the car in front of you. By providing a decent amount of space, you will be able to stop in time for an emergency.

The gas pedal is the one directly to the right of the break. It makes the car go faster. You will notice as you…

One big Urinal

This last weekend a young lady and I are having breakfast at this hotel restaurant in Oregon. I walk into the men’s room and notice the largest urinal I have seen. These pictures were taken with my phone so the quality isn’t that great, but the thing to notice is the one on the left is your standard wall to floor urinal. Its height is maybe 4ft. The one to the right looks like a giant evil cocoon; about 5 ft tall if not more, that will open up devour anyone who attempts to use it, with space for more.

I did of course use it, and lived to tell the story.

Junk in One Hand, Dead Wood in the Other

So I walk into the men's room, as I often do throughout the day, and one of the urinals has a guy taking a piss. Yes, this happens in the men's room, that's what it is there for. The interesting thing about this guy was, with his left hand he was doing his thing (pissing), with his right hand he had a printout and was reading it. And that's where the odd part comes in. Personally, no piece of information on paper has ever been so important to me that I couldn't just wait till I was done pissing to read it… But that's just me.

On Top of Old Smokey

Not something that's a huge issue in the area I live, as most our energy in hydraulic, but in the areas that are effected, I think it's interesting that we went from a country that went into the mountains for our coal to a country that that removes the mountain to get to the coal. Progress??


Just something to think about next time you throw trash out the window, start up your SUV, or accidently get pregnant with that 5th child. There are currently over 5,000 animals on the endangered species list. And the only major contribution to that number going down is most are moved from the endangered list to the extinct list.

The last time animals species were exterminated at the same rate was the dinosaurs: Most likely caused by a comet or asteroid hitting the planet. Now instead of a natural disaster or nature taking it's toll; the two legged, thumbed, walking locust is the cause.

Here's just a few:

Sumatran Orangutan (Indonesia)Sumatran Tiger (Indonesia) Lear’s Macaw (Brazil) Brown Spider Monkey (Colombia, Venezuela) Rancho Grande Harlequin Frog (Venezuela) Panamanian Golden Frog (Panama) Pygmy Three-toed Sloth (Panama) Yellow-crested Cockatoo (Indonesia) Golden-bellied Capuchin (Brazil) Elegant Frog (Australia) Orinoco Crocodile (Colombia, Venezuela) Mountain Gorilla (Rwa…

Police Raid for a WII

In further proof that they earn the wages we pay them, police in Polk County Florida raided the house of a drug dealer. Upon entering the house, a few officers notice a WII game sitting next to the television. So, while some members of the High Intensity Drug Trafficking Area (HIDTA) task force searched the premises, others bowled. According to the story some members played the video game at various times during the day, for a total of a little over an hour of playing time, and charging tax payers around $4,000 for the raid. Maybe the few people actually searching for evidence should have looked a little harder, because if the had, maybe they would have seen the internet camera that had been left on and pointing right at the police force jumping and clapping hands at each strike.

Full story on

E-Waste in Ghana

The nice thing about living in America is that we don't have to watch or deal with the results of the waste we through away. Check out this video on e-waste from PBS. Well worth the length.

An Egregious Violation of Men's Room Etiquette

Walked into the men's room yesterday and there was a guy standing there like he was waiting for a urinal, except for there were available ones, and only one was being used. I quickly realized what was going on, as the two guys where having a conversation. Yes, one guy was actually staring at the other guys back while he was taking a piss and they were actually having a conversation. As if what they had to say really couldn't wait that long.

There are times in life that I wish we could still give a swirly to someone, as I think the guy who walked in after me would have helped wet these two guys down. He wasn't impressed by the men's room etiquette violation either.

Hitler's Kanye West Response

Since Kanye West has been in the celebrity news lately with his outburst at the VMA's (which I didn't watch), and I've always thought he was kind of a douche-bag anyway, I thought it would be worth adding a video that even Hitler is no longer a fan.

Confront a Judge and Go to Jail

Further proof that the freedom of speech isn't so free in America. A Texas man, confronted a judge in the men's room, who ruled against him. The man didn't assault or threaten to assault the judge, all the man did was call him a fool. And in the intolerant way most conservative states deal with people, the judge put the man in jail.

Read more on MSNBC


This last weekend I went to a concert. It wasn't a local show and at a pretty decent outdoor venue. It's also the kind of musician that isn't cheep to see. The girl I went with, I will refer to as irritating bitch who talks to much during a concert (ibwttmdac). With her was other irritating bitch who talks to much during a concert (oibwttmdac). And with oibwttmdac was some dude who I didn't talk to all that much (dwidttatm).

We were all talking and having a good time before the show started, and I thought once the show started they would quite down a bit. During an occasional song they did quite down. But for the most part, they talked almost through the whole thing. And it's not like they were having a discussion that couldn't wait, or even really needed to happen at all. At one point ibwttmdac tried to bring me into the conversation. A conversation, at that moment, that consisted of see if we could do the Vulcan (two fingers to one side, two to the other) gre…

United Breaks Guitars

Kind of a catchy little tune.

Asian Drivers

Driving in to work this morning and before I get on to the interstate I have to take a back road near my house, the entire length of the road I'm stuck behind some car that is driving 5 miles per hour below the speed limit. When I get to the turnoff for the interstate, I look and notice it's an old Asian lady.

After getting off the interstate, I'm on another arterial. This time, I'm behind a car that keeps hitting it's breaks- even though there is no car in front of it. When we make a turn and I get a chance to pass the car, I notice it's another Asian lady.

My workout buddy and good friend is Thai. And we used to take turns driving to the gym, but it got to the point that it was irritating and embarrassing to ride in the car with him, so that now I've just decided to be the designated driver.

I'm far from being a racist, but I do believe in stereotyping and Asians fit the stereotype. Here's the thing I don't get; I've been to south-east Asi…

Panda Stats

There are only about 1,590 pandas left in the wild in China.

giant panda adults eat up to 40 pounds of bamboo per day

panda's habitat in China is being destroyed and divided into smaller patches (mostly be highways and roads), pandas are having a hard time finding mates, threatening to reduce their gene pool under what is genetically viable to sustain the species.

Human activity - logging, animal grazing, and agriculture - are the major sources of habitat destruction.

Pandas used to be found everywhere on the mountains in central and south China, and in Myanmar and Vietnam. However, their living space has shrunk markedly and they are on the verge of extinction due to the climatic changes and human activities.

Today, pandas are found in six isolated forest areas in Sichuan, Gansu, and Shaanxi provinces in China.

With just over 1.3 billion people (1,330,044,605 as of mid-2008), China is the world's largest and most populous country.

The Giant Panda is an endangered species, threatened …

Visit Alaska

A heartwarming message for Alaska tourism.

Airline Humor

With the airlines and airports back in the news lately for doing what they do best - provide crappy service, I thought I'd post a little airline imagery.

Great Delivery UPS

Thanks UPS for doing such a fantastic job delivery my package. It’s not too often that I receive something that has tire tracks from actually being driven over.

Round Peg Square Whole

“You can’t fit a round peg in a square whole.” Have you ever wondered what it’s like to be that round peg? Let’s say you are the round peg living in a box of square pegs. All the square pegs know you don’t fit in, and you know you don’t fit in, but you are in the toy box with them, so you pretend to be as square as you can pretend to be. There is no option to get out of the box, as you've been in it too long and the lid is closed. So, what’s a round peg to do? The round peg just hangs out with the square pegs, trying to fit in as best as a round peg can, waiting for the times that someone will try to fit the round peg into that square whole. And someone always does try, and it always fails. So the peg gets thrown back into the box, instead of moved to a box of round pegs where it belongs.

Utopia or Dystopia?

You ever watch one of those sci-fi movies projecting a dystopian world, thinking that could never happen, or at least not in my lifetime. Does a dystopian world have to be post apocalyptic? Does it have to be in the works of fiction writers? According to Wikipedia dystopian is, "characterized by poverty, oppression, war, violence, disease, pollution, nuclear fallout and/or the abridgement of human rights, resulting in widespread unhappiness, suffering, and other kinds of pain".

Relevant to our current society?

Poverty - about 25,000 people die every day of hunger or hunger-related causes. With about 32.3 million people living below the official poverty level, making a poverty rate of 11.8%. In 2005, one out of three urban dwellers (approximately 1 billion people) was living in slum conditions.

Oppression - Most recently we've seen Iran arresting protesters. China, one of the largest communist countries in the world is becoming the worlds largest economy. Ever heard of North…

Nissan LEAF

While GM is still plugging away on the Chevy Volt a gas/electric car, Nissan is right on the heals of Tesla with the Nissan LEAF an all electric vehicle, expected to be on roads in 2010.

The all electric LEAF is a compact five-door hatchback with room for four. The LEAF won't get quite the mileage as the Tesla Model S, with the current estimates on the LEAF at 100 miles per charge. But as a low cost daily all electric commuter, I think it should sell pretty well.

Closing in on 7 Billion


From Twitter to Newspeak

OMG! In further proof of the dumbing down of society, or that that Goerge Orwell might have been more prolific than previously thought. An author has recently decided to use the latest fad Twitter, to publish his novel 140 characters at a time, according to a story at scitech. For those who haven't read the book Nineteen Eighty-Four, it was written in the late 1940's about the year 1984 where a totalitarian regime is always watching and controlling the population, through the promotion of blind obedience. One of the ways they do this is through newspeak, an abbreviated version on the English language. With twitter being the latest fad, and people lol'ing there way through a text message or IM conversation, while they talk about their x-mas plans or the item they have 4 sale on e-bay, how long will it be before we see a dictionary of newspeak to tell us all the meaning of the abbreviated words we need to know? "It's a beautiful thing, the destruction of words"…

A Guys Perfect Jon

Sent from a cranky reader...

I just got back from having drinks with the girls and I haven't laughed so hard in a long time. One of my girlfriends is having some bladder problems. I know what your thinking. She must be old and probably not in good shape... Totally the opposite. She's about 35 awsome body and very cute. Anyway, her doctor sent her to a physical therapist who specializes in keegal (don't know how to spell it ) exercises. She is to see this therapist every week for a month were they practice doing all different kinds of exercises. She practices on her own for about 10minutes than he yes he measures her success by by sticking his fingers up her vagina and feeling the size of her bladder and how tight she can make herself. If this does not work she will than be shown how to use circular toys to make her tighter. Now if this isn't bad enough her therapist is really kind of cute and not married. The only good thing about this besides us having the best laugh …

Chase and Coal Companies

Through various acquisition, JP Morgan Chase now owns most banking I use. So it would be nice if that company were a little more responsible in it's policies.

Like Working with Children

How my job equates to being a teacher and working with young children. Have to hold hands. My job consists of making sure others are doing there job, and not upsetting them in the process.Be careful of swearing or saying anything offensive, like kids we don't want to offend or they might cry, so will the developers and PM at Microsoft.When they get upset about something they will pout or cry.Have to talk down to them, so they will understand - dumb it down.Presentation need lots of color and bubbles. The 07 version of Power Point has lots of great ways of making that presentation look cool to keep their attentionNeed to provide them with playtime (aka moral builders).If they go without enough sleep, or are sick, they will get cranky.If they do a good job, they get a prize. Ie, plaque, certificate, or a kudos in a e-mailIf they do a bad job, they get rewarded as well, because we wouldn't want anyone to feel badThe teachers/bosses pet get's the promotion, sweet jobs, and …

...Because You're Single

Sent from a cranky reader...

Not your normal blog but I thought I would send it anyway. I just got back from a vacation with the family. My kids and I had a great time but I almost killed my family.

We rented a house (that I found ) it had 3 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms and a private pool. Grandma and Grandpa got one room, makes since. My brother in-law and his wife got another and they brought a friend who got the other room. I got the couch in the great room with all the kids! I went to my mother in-law( actually ex mother in-law ) and told her I was going to take the other bedroom. Her response was " Her husband MIGHT be coming up later so then were would he sleep" I said it was not my problem. When or if he does come then I will move back out to the couch. It was then brought to my attention well you are single so no matter what sleeping on the couch was not a big deal but her and her husband could not fit on the couch. Fine, I' ll take the couch. Her husband ca…