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- Men vs. Women Cooking
- Top 10 Things from 2009 that I Don't Care About
- My Kind of Santa
- Climate Change Deal
- Them, Me, and the Beer on Tap
- Extra Time, Vicodin, and a Proper Balance of Both
- Lieberman - Democrat > Independent > Republican
- Tax the Babies
- Alaska Oil Spill, and the News
- Proof That Girls Are Evil
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- Louisiana and Arkansas Democrats, Get Off Your Ass...
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- Why Pot Hasn't Been Legalized
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- Yes on REF.71
- Scary Stories About Climate Change
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- Ice Melt in the Arctic
- Deuteronomy 22:13-21
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- One big Urinal
- Junk in One Hand, Dead Wood in the Other
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Thinking about going into the oldest profession in the world in these hard economic times? If so, give it some thought and planning before ...
One of the joys of working for Microsoft as a vender or contractor is you are not a full time employee, which of course means you are treate...
Image Source I love how I always get stuck dealing with poor customer service as it gives me something to write about in this blog. My...
• Whenever someone takes a drink • Whenever we see a girls boobs • Whenever we see Hanks butt • Whenever one of Hanks books is shown ...
Some helpful tips for the typical drive-tard out on the roads. The turn signal is to the left of the steering column. Click it up when tur...
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Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Monday, December 28, 2009
As the year rolls to a close, these are my top ten items from 2009 that received way to much time in the press and I really don't give a crap about.
10. H1N1 Swine Flue Vaccine - This is a holdover from 2008, but once the vaccine came out, it's all they talked about. Who's getting it? who is not getting it? Does it work? What's the dosage? And of course, how much is being made? Please people! There are so many other things that you are more likely to get, and are much worse for you. Fucking mindless sheep!
9. Boeing 787 Dreamliner - This is a little more local than national, but living in Seattle, it's been impossible to turn on the news, or read the local papers without headlines of the 787. The plane is two years behind schedule and finally flew. That's nice, can we now talk about something else Seattle.
8. The White House Party Crashers - AKA the Salahi's. These people were looking for a little fame, they did it by crashing a white house party, and guess what? They got exactly what they were looking for. Good job America.
7. Balloon Boy - Also on the list of people looking for a little fame, and the mindless public giving it to them. The only saving grace from this is the stiff sentence the judge handed out to this family, hopefully setting an example for others.
6. President Obama - Yes, I am one of the people who had high hopes for the guy and is beginning to feel a little let down. But come on, he's been in office for less than a year, lets give him a break and a chance.
5. Bill O'Reilly - You know people, if you would stop watching his show and clicking on any news article that mentions his name, he would go back to the rock he crawled out from under.
4. Tea Baggers - Speaking of right-wing-testicle-lickers, why is it that an ignorant minority population of the country gets so much face time in the press? Because people in this country watch.
3. Tiger Woods - So the guy sleeps around, who the hell wouldn't in his place. Besides his wife is a hottie, which means she's also probably frigid in bed. Just the honor of fucking her should be enough, she shouldn't actually have to do anything while there. Move on you bunch of prudes.
2. Susan Boyle - Yea! Some ugly fat chick can sing. Did you hear that her CD is the top selling CD right now. That's because most of her fans aren't smart enough to illegally download it like everyone else.
1. Michael Jackson - Everyone hated the guy before he died. Then suddenly he's a beloved pop star after he dies. I don't know if anyone is aware of it, but a half dozen other celebrities died this last year as well.
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
Monday, December 21, 2009
Thursday, December 17, 2009
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
This got me thinking about left brain and right brain people. They say left brain people tend to be more logical and analytical, while right brain people have a more subjective view of the world. I’ve always considered myself a right brain person. I used to do theatre, I paint and shoot photography, and for the most part I can’t stand my office job. My office job that consists of sitting at a desk all day, doing what I’m told, and staying within the mental box along with my right brained co-workers. Most of the people I work with, seem relatively content with what they do. Yes, they might bitch and complain on occasion, but at the end of the day the paycheck, job security, and a stable life take priority over affecting the senses in the world around them. I’ve always faulted these people, wanting to stand up and scream, “What’s wrong with you people? Don’t you see how fucked up this is!” But when it comes down to it, they can’t see. To them this isn’t fucked up, this is the way it should be, this is the way the world works. And in reality, they are right. Without the corporate office monkey’s where would the rest of us be? Hanging out in San Francisco preaching free love? We've seen how well that worked out in the 60’s.
What’s the point of this post and what’s it have to do with drug abuse and artists? Nothing. I’m just feeling a little introspective around this time of year, as I see another year go past while I stagnate at my desk, working for the large soulless corporate giant into a new year.
With the year ending, the workload lightens as it does each year around this time. I could sit at my computer and spend the extra time writing a great novel, or I could spend my time updating blogs and reading the news. The question then becomes, am I a Jack Kerouac or am I just like every other left brain person out there? The only difference between me and them is, I just haven’t realized it yet... Correction, I am one step closer to realization, I can’t hum the Jeopardy theme in tune either.
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Joe Lieberman has decided to make himself a roadblock to legislation. First he was against the public option, and now he's against expanding Medicare. What he's really against is this bill. Is he bitter about the lack of party support, or is he just a Republican in disguise? According to this video, Lieberman used to support the Medicare expansion that is in the bill, but then again, he was for it before it was actually in the bill. Now he needs to be against it to continue his road blocking the bill, get his name in the news, and to support the Republicans, aka the party of no.
Friday, December 11, 2009
"Currently if you have children you get a tax credit. I propose we change the system so that:
1 Child: You get a tax credit
2 Children: You now negate the first credit and get no credit at all
3. Children: You now pay a tax on the third child and so on...the tax burden gets higher the more kids you have.
Adoption: For every US child you adopt you get a tax credit"
Sounds good to me. And it's nice to see that I'm not the only one who feels we need to control population growth.
Wednesday, December 09, 2009
Here is a link to at least one article on this bit of actual news.
Monday, December 07, 2009
Thursday, December 03, 2009
Tuesday, December 01, 2009
Monday, November 30, 2009
A group of concerned citizens is trying to get on the ballot in California for 2010 the California Protection of Marriage Act. If you are a California resident, then please sign the petition and support the cause. Because after all, if gays can't get married for tradition, straight people shouldn't be allowed to divorce for the same reason.
Visit Rescue Marriage for more information or to support the cause.
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Ahhh, good stuff that Palin book.
Monday, November 23, 2009
So I am sitting on the crapper in one of our work buildings and I look over to find this sign:
Then I think, this would be a great thing in the lady’s room. But for the masculine excremental unit, unless males are increasingly peeing like girls (which wouldn’t surprise me where we work), what value would this have? Liquid waste goes to the self NON-flushing green urinals for the most part. If I only had to expunge liquid waste, I wouldn’t even be in this stall.
Oh well. If they ever decide to swap rooms at least they will be prepared.
Friday, November 20, 2009
In Arkansas contact Blanche Lincoln -here
In Louisiana contact Mary Landrieu -here
The bill is designed to rein in costs, expand coverage and bar industry practices like denying coverage to those with pre-existing conditions.
Republicans (The party of No) don’t support the bill because it’s proposed by Democrats. But Democrats should at least support the concept of allowing the bill to be debated, amended, and voted on.
Thursday, November 19, 2009
My life is a Dilbert cartoon ~ Eccentri City
So, Cranky and I work at the same place and I forwarded this for “collaborative analysis”.
15 Signs Your Workplace Is Dysfunctional
We were surprised to find out that, there is not ONE of the 15 signs that does not apply. We thought we could cratch off at least a few. Surely it isn’t that egregious. But alas, each of the 15 signs is prevalent. Here’s how it goes down with each in our workplace:
Sign No. 1: Conspicuously posted vision or value statements are filled with vague but important-sounding words like "excellence" and "quality."
Here’s out team’s mission statement:
“We lead and execute programs to ensure [our business’] sales, service and support teams are “business ready” for products and services by:
· Seeing the road ahead
· Role call
· Manage Whales and Fish
· Build our strengths”
“Business ready”? Sounds nice and vague. I know for a fact we can hardly see an inch in front of us let alone the “road ahead”. And you know there is a problem when including sea life in your mission statement. Anybody hungry for some Ivar’s?
Sign No. 2: Bringing up a problem is considered as evidence of a personality defect rather than as an observation of reality.
Cranky and I can’t iterate how many times we’ve heard “oh, that information isn’t published yet barring this and that”. Moreover, if you talk real and bring up big problems and ways to fix them besides the “ignore it and it will go away” technique, you are a major douche bag for rocking the boat.
Sign No. 3: If by chance there are problems, the usual solution is a motivational seminar.
We just had another team “onsite offsite” (codename for “too cheap to have a real offsite) full of motivational crap. We have a team mascot and loads of coffee mugs, cheesy awards and other trinkets galore to make up for the fact that there is little to no true leadership or direction. Sorry guys, overuse of symbols in a crappy environment only make us feel like Nazis.
Sign No. 4: Double messages are delivered with a straight face.
Here’s a great philosophy where we work. Let’s take on every program that is shoved to us. Then reduce our remit after over-performing and piss everyone off. Then let’s hire vendors to do, well, sit around and look like vendors. Hey, they can work a little bit though and help us work on projects that track projects that are projects for tracking projects. Leadership + true motivation = results. We have neither inputs, so not surprisingly, no results.
Sign No. 5: History is regularly edited to make executive decisions more correct, and correct decisions more executive than they actually were.
Sweet! Our last scorecard measured us as a 4 out of 5! Never mind our recent first iteration of a scorecard is a lame survey to internal partners. And never mind only a tiny fraction of our projects were actually surveyed. Oh, and ask Cranky about fudging numbers for his reports to make his boss seem completely overworked and in need of more empire.
Sign No. 6: People are discouraged from putting things in writing.
I’m not even mentioning who I am or where in the company I work. And this is a private blog. Still, I’m a little freaked. Imagine how I feel at work trying to write genuine and honest emails.
Sign No. 7: Directions are ambiguous and often vaguely threatening.
Director paraphrase: “Okay everyone, we have a new remit that reduces the scope of your already ambiguous role. However, the new remit is just as ambiguous. So now, instead of an open-ended ambiguity that allowed you to add value were it was needed, we now are restricting that so you can be confused and not add appropriate value at the same time. I am also not going to adequately communicate this out to our partners. Oh, and I am also very passive so I am expecting you to plow the road from the bottom up because I don’t want to deal with it.”
Sign No. 8: Internal competition is encouraged and rewarded.
“Encouraged” is an understatement. Internal competition is built into the system. Moreover, depending on your luck, you can be an apple compared to a basket of other fruit. Ultimately, those unable to thrive in a nepotistic, dishonest environment don’t get a good grade.
Sign No. 9: Decisions are made at the highest level possible.
I spend more to reviewing, approving, obtaining sponsorship, re-reviewing, re-approving, etc. than I do actually getting any work done.
Sign No. 10: Delegating means telling somebody to do something, not giving them the power to do it.
Cranky has this problem especially. You may have seen his posts about Dash-Trash. Increasingly, due to disorganization and mismanagement, Dash-Trash folks are increasingly being asked to drive things they should not be driving, and given no authority to do so. Good luck with that.
Sign No. 11: Management approaches from the latest best-seller are regularly misunderstood to mean what we're doing already is right on the mark.
Yeah, I am sure that all of our projects to track projects that track projects would really impress a bad adjunct MBA professor, but the folks who write good management material would be mortified to see their matter miss-used in such way. But it’s okay, because these projects have really cool names in all caps like FOCUS and FORWARD. I feel like we are raising the bar with those alone!
Sign No. 12: Resources are tightly controlled.
I would say this is the sickest dysfunction where we work, because they will actually hire vendor people then assign them little or no work just to build an empire, but we can’t even get webcams for remote meetings.
· Paying a group of vendors a lot of money to misguide to augment the disorganization of our hectic, mismanaged environment so we can justify our jobs and build empires – APPROVED
· Cheap webcam to increase meeting productivity with a plethora of remote partners – DENIED.
Sign No. 13: You are expected to feel lucky to have a job and know you could lose it if you don't toe the line.
Surprisingly, our team has lost few during the last four rounds of layoffs. Management has done a great job of keeping everything so ambiguous as to what we do, executives are afraid. We may be a core cog, or not (we’re actually not), but they just don’t know. Yet, with all the lay-offs, we are meant to feel lucky we are even here. No matter. We are reducing through attrition anyway with at least one person a month either transferring or quitting for a start-up.
Sign No. 14: Rules are enforced based on who you are rather than what you do.
Here, you are either in the nepotistic clique, or you are not. Moreover, if you build the rules, you can break them if you get emotional or wound up, or feel the need to screw everything up to make you job look more important i.e. Cranky’s boss.
Sign No. 15: The company fails the Dilbert Test.
At the lower levels, we can laugh about all of this. But we are very secretive with our humor.
When management can’t laugh at themselves, you are in a bad org.
There are a number of Dilbert cartoons online that really nail the dysfunctional organization. Check these out:
Dilbert: Steaming Pile of Failure
We work on steaming piles of failure for a living. But come management 1:1 time – everything is FANTASTIC! Discomfort with honesty and truth is a huge sign of dysfunction.
Dilbert: Bold New Strategy
Our organization has had so many major “restructures” that we don’t even pay attention any more. If you asked me, I could not actually tell you where I was in an org chart past the functional level. But every time it happens, we get an email about how strategic and good for the company it is. I have a special email rule for these – divert to Junk folder.
Dilbert: Impossible Goal
Hey, presenting really well with PowerPoint pomp about goals that are impossible is how you get ahead here. By the time it all fails you have either been promoted, or at least made a lateral move.
Dilbert: Bungee Boss
I’m on my third boss in less than a year. It’s all good though, because I am still “dotted line” to my previous bosses. My org structure feels more like a funnel than a pyramid.
Hope all of you Cranky readers feel just a little better now knowing you don’t work where we do.
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
One of the joys of working for Microsoft as a vender or contractor is you are not a full time employee, which of course means you are treated as such by the full time employees.
Every employee/vender/contractor is provided a badge. The badge has a picture of the person. The badge is used for many purposes such as entering the building and security. It is to be warn and visible at all times. For venders and contractors it's orange. For FTE's it's blue. You are either a blue badge or an orange badge, so know your place.
The company store is one the perks Microsoft provides it's employees. An orange badge will allow you into the store, you just aren't allowed to purchase anything once there. Unless you are friends with a blue badge and can talk them into it.
Microsoft provides it's own bus service called the Connector. The service picks up at select locations around King and Snohomish county. This provides employees a ride to work on a bus with WiFi and the ability to avoid the general public, as it's for FTE's only. No orange badges allowed, not even in the back of the bus.
Both FTE's and Dash Trash are allowed to sit at the same table in the cafeteria, and purchase the same food. But for the most part the FTE's prefer to sit it groups together.
By adding a v- or a- in front of someone's e-mail alias, it allows the recipient the knowledge that they don't need to respond to that person.
When working on a project with deliverables, since you aren't an employee, they obviously don't report to you or even have to deal with you, so there is not reason to attend the meetings you set up or complete the items assigned to them.
Most venders aren't provided a place to sit or an office. Since they don't work for Microsoft there is no reason to provide them a place to sit at Microsoft. Usually they have to find an empty office, sit in the cafeteria, or wherever they can find an open seat. Contractors are provided a seat, but it's usually crammed into an office with a handful of people even though the office was designed for only 1 or 2 people. Some are grouped into a larger seating area often referred to as a coral or CSG Bay. They get a small desk, and that's about it.
If you are a early riser don't plan on working before 7:00am. Vender and Contractor badges won't let you in the building that early. Apparently Microsoft figures if you are coming in early, you must be up to trouble.
Ever talk to a Microsoft employee in the real world? Notice how when they say they work there, their nose kind of raises a little in the air. Just like they are a little bit better than everyone else. It's like that to work with them as well. Why bother picking up after themselves in the break room, that's what other people are for. Why even bother flushing the toilet?
For familiarity and safety, they tend to live in the same neighborhoods. Few non-Microsoft employees allowed. Most employees once they've worked for the company move to Sammamish and Issaquah. Close to work, matching McMansion, and no matter what your race is, you fit in because you can take the Connector together.
I've thought about hanging signs that say "Blue Badge Only" or "Orange Badge Only" over the taller and shorter drinking fountains, as it would seem appropriate.
For those who don't know:
Vender (v-) - is someone who is employed by another company yet reports to a Microsoft manager. They can't work on the assignment indefinitely. Yet Microsoft has the option of ending the assignment whenever they want.
Contractor (a-) - is someone who is also employed by another company, but due to a lawsuit many years ago, they can only work 12 months on an assignment at Microsoft. After the 12 months they must take a 90 day break before they are allowed another contract or vender assignment.
Alias- this is a unique name assigned to each employee. It's used to accessing information, logins, e-mails etc. it's usually derived some shortened combination of a person first and last name. a- and v-are added to the beginning of each contractors or venders alias, so to further clarify who they are.
FTE - Microsoft Full Time Employee
Dash Trash - This is slang for v- or a-
Monday, November 16, 2009
Thursday, November 12, 2009
As a registered Republican they sent me a questionnaire about the state of the Republican Party asking for feedback. Followed up of course by an ask for a donation.
What I found interesting is the way the questions were worded, worded in a way to elicit the response that they wanted to hear. I generally disagree with the Republican Party on most all issues, yet had to fight the urge to agree with them on the way they were worded. I can see how the old, easily influenced, and general population of this country might agree with them.
“Do you oppose the Obama-Pelosi heath care takeover plan that would bring Washington bureaucrats between doctors and patients, ration medical treatment, and deny critical care while skyrocketing the national debt.”
Wow! How could I respond to that, it’s not even close to the plan that’s proposed? I’m suprised that they didn’t have the words ‘Death Panels" mixed in there.
“Should the Democrats’ so-called Stimulus Bill with it’s wasteful pork-barrel spending be repealed.”
Well let’s see. The bill created or saved over 600,000 jobs (or so we've been told) and most likely helped keep the unemployment rate from getting higher that it already is. The bill included tax cuts, spending on education and healthcare and green energy. Apparently our current Republicans in government never studied Keynesian economics. To get out of a depression or recession the government needs to spend money, then when the economy recovers we have tax payers working and paying taxes. Dwight Eisenhower (a Republican) was aware of this, and continued and expanded many of the New Deal policies to include spending money on an interstate system to cross the country.
Do you oppose the Obama National Energy Tax, also known as “cap and trade,” which would skyrocket your utility bills and destroy jobs while having virtually no impact on the environment?
Actually it wouldn't and that's been proven by a few studies and current cap and trade systems.
The questions go on and are just as lopsided, and written in a way to elicit only one possible response to each. After completing my questionnaire and sending it back, I’m going to assume that my name will be removed from the republican
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Thursday, November 05, 2009
Then Jesus will turn to those on His left hand and say, “Depart from me because I was hungry and you did not feed me, I was thirsty and you did not give me to drink, I was sick and you did not visit me.” These will ask Him, “When did we see You hungry, or thirsty or sick and did not come to Your help?” And Jesus will answer them, “Whatever you neglected to do unto one of these least of these, you neglected to do unto Me!”
I think if Jesus were alive today he would not be very happy with the direction these so-called Christians have taken his teachings. Most of the protesters are older, predominantly white, and self-identified as Christians. These protesters are represented in the government by older, predominantly white, self-identified Christians, aka the party of no.
If Jesus were a member of congress, how would he vote on the healthcare bill?
Wednesday, November 04, 2009
- Breckenridge Colorado, voted to allow adults to legally possess small amounts of marijuana
- Maine approved dispensaries to supply marijuana to patients for medicinal purposes. A follow-up to a 1999 measure that legalized medical marijuana but did not set up a distribution system.
Not to mention the Obama administration announcing recently that they are going to stop going after marijuana dispensers in states that have legalized its use.
Tuesday, November 03, 2009
Check out this video for example, it's pretty clear. If we allow gay marriage, they are going to teach being gay to kids, and your children will become gay. So vote no if you don't way gay children.
And now notice the pro-gay marriage video. No scare tactics, no ant-straight commentary, just hey let's treat everyone as equals.
Being gay isn't a choice. Come on, would any really willing choose to be ridiculed by society, live in fear or attack in the red states, choose to have their family disown them. No! and no, teachers aren't going to suddenly start teaching gay to children. Hopefully the only thing they will teach is tolerance.
Monday, November 02, 2009
As the debate goes on over healthcare reform, and the conservatives protest the idea of changing the status quo, I wonder how many of them would participate in those protests if this had happened to them.
Thursday, October 29, 2009
One of my favorite jobs involved working in a pizza joint. I basically lived off pizza and tips, but my co-workers were awesome, we had lots of fun, and political correctness never entered into our interactions with each other.
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Pearl Jam - Last Kiss (remake): I know living in Seattle that I'm supposed to love Pearl Jam, but come on, Eddie Vedder singing Last Kiss makes me wish I were the dead girl in the car.
Del Amitri - Roll to Me: This song made it to the top 10 list back in 1995 and has haunted me ever since. If you don't know what I'm talking about, listen to a clip on Amazon and this song might make you want to go on a shooting spree as well.
Bryan Adams- Have You Ever Really Loved a Woman: the them song for Don Juan DeMarco, and when it came out there was nowhere I could go that wasn't playing it: malls, grocery stores, the radio on most all pop stations, my college campus, and in my nightmares.
Dave Matthews Band- Too Much: you know what is too much Dave, the number of times you say those words in this song.
The Beatles - Ob-la-di, ob-la-da: The thing with the Beatles is, they have come out with some of the best music of all time, yet also come out with some of the worst. "Ob-la-di, ob-la-da, life goes on, brah!" Yeah brah, life does go one, just hopefully without ever hearing this song again.
John Lennon - Give Peace A Chance: Speaking of the Beatles; yes we should give peace a chance, but we shouldn't have an entire song that just repeats those lines over and over again. Maybe someone should have played this for Dave Matthews before he embarked on his writing career.
Eric Clapton & Babyface - Change the World: First of all, Eric Clapton is a musical god. Now having said that, even a god can make mistakes, and this time he did when he decided to appeal to a younger audience in teaming up with Babyface on this stinker of a song. "I would be the sunlight in your universe" No you wouldn't, because my universe wouldn't have this song in it.
Train - Hey, Soul Sister: The band has the name Train. Right there that puts them on a crap list, just for having a crappy name. But When Hey Soul Sister came out and was played constantly that solidified it for me. This band blows!
Whitney Houston - I Will Always Love you & Celine Dion - My Heart Will Go on: I'm going to group these two because, well they go together in the same pile of garbage. If you were alive when these movie songs came out, then you know what I'm talking about. They got so much airplay that even now I cringe at just thinking of them.
Lenny Kravitz - Fly Away: Yes Lenny, please fly away and take this song with you.
Paul McCartney and Stevie Wonder - Ebony and Ivory: Another stinking up the charts post Beatles musician. But hey, at least it wasn't a theme song for an equally crappy movie.
There are others that I could add to this list like anything by New Kids on the Block, or any number of other bands that were so bad their entire collection of music sucks. But I wanted to limit this list to people who some consider good musicians most of the time. Except for the Del Amitri song, that song sucks so much it makes me hate all their music, even though it's the only one I've ever heard from that band.
Monday, October 26, 2009
"The intensity of Atlantic hurricanes is likely to increase during this century wit higher peak wind speeds, rainfall intensity, and storm surge height and strength"
"The number of freezing days in the Southeast has declined by 4 to 7 days per year since the mid 1970's"
"The home state of our last two republican presidents will be heavily hit by high levels of drought.
The intergovernmental panelt on climate changes estimates average temperatures in Texas could rise by about 5.85 degrees by 2100 ad the current rate of global warming."
Since most of the south doesn't believe in global warming, I guess the only other explanation is God must be pissed at you about something.
Friday, October 23, 2009
Vote yes, it is the morally and socially right thing to do.
Thursday, October 22, 2009
I wouldn't say this is scary, in fact I'd say it was well done. But then again, I'm one of those crazy people who actually believe in global warming and the negative impact humans are having on this planet, and the need to do something about it.
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Monday, October 19, 2009
Friday, October 16, 2009
My friend who blogs over at Seattle Feeze sent me an e-mail about this, “cool event I'm attending in two weeks that I thought you might want to join me for. Global Trauma Intervention.” An event to help trauma victims in India. Because we’re friends and she obviously knows how much I love helping people.
After checking out the link, and noticing that it’s being held on a Friday night at a church, I respond with a simple, “it's held at a church” knowing that she also knows my love of the cloth and being preached at.
At which point the e-mail turned into an IM conversation.
SF: Didn't notice that. Shit. So...that's a no?
CM: My concern would be bursting into a ball of flame if I ever walked into a church. Will there be booze provided?
SF: haha. I don't know. Hold on.
CM: And how much money are they going to ask me to donate?
SF: I don't think it's like that. No drinks, just dessert. I think.
CM: (After reading who will be talking) "Inspirational message by Dr. BJ Prashantham" they are going to preach to us!
SF: Yeah. Ok, ok, I'll count you out. Damn, a little inspiration never hurt anyone.
CM: It hurts me. All the way to my insides.
CM: Just thinking about it, kind of hurts right now.
SF: In that case, I’ll try to never inspire you. EVER.
CM: I think I’m going to go throw up real quick.
SF: Oh sheesh
CM: (after reading more about it) "Donate to the work of Global Trauma Intervention – your tax deductible contributions can make a life-changing difference in trauma victims around the world" - I grew up in Spokane, I’m traumatized. Where’s my donation?
CM: So anyway... yeah, that doesn't sound like fun at all. Maybe if it were to help lost puppies or something, I’d be into it.
SF: Of course. Damn. I’m kind of sorry I asked
I would have bitch slapped her to, but since it was over IM I couldn't.
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Along the Washington State coast each year, people come out in droves with buckets and shovels in hand to participate in the Razor clam digs. The Washington Department of Fish and Wildlife (WDFW) has completed testing the clams, and approved the digs at five beaches after a series of marine toxin tests confirmed the clams were safe to eat. Evening digs are scheduled at Twin Harbors (Oct. 16-19); Long Beach and Copalis (Oct. 16, 17 and 18); and Mocrocks and Kalaloch Beach (Oct. 17 and 18) according to the wdfw website.
It's interesting to note, that in the world we live in these days, we have to add restrictions on the number clams being dug so as not to deplete the stock, as we would eat every edible plant, animal, and fish to extinction if not for these restrictions. It's also interesting to note, that even in this day and age of EPA, people going "green", and government restrictions on business and industry, we still have to have our food tested for toxins and chemicals before it can be deemed safe to eat as we continue to pollute our natural environment with mercury in all our fish, great patches of trash in the pacific, and planetary warming to the point of melting polar ice into nothing.
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
Monday, October 12, 2009
Here's a like to the full passage.
Thursday, October 08, 2009
The turn signal is to the left of the steering column. Click it up when turning right, click it down when turning left. The turn signal activates lights on each corner of the car that flash and notify other drivers your intent to turn or change lanes. Once the turn/lane change is complete, be sure that the flashing light in your dashboard has turned off. If it hasn't use the same switch to de-activate it.
We know that you are paranoid about hitting another car, but continually tapping the break is irritating. It also causes the person behind you to do the same, and in turn, it slows down the overall flow of traffic. If you are worried about hitting the car in front of you, don't ride the ass of the car in front of you. By providing a decent amount of space, you will be able to stop in time for an emergency.
The gas pedal is the one directly to the right of the break. It makes the car go faster. You will notice as you press the gas pedal that gauge directly above the steering wheel and below the dash, goes up in numbers.
Now this is where it starts to get tricky:
That gauge in the dash with the numbers is called the speedometer. It tells you how fast you are going. In the U.S. that is measured in miles per hour (MPH) so when the gauge hits 40mph you are driving at 40 miles per hour.
As you drive you will notice some signs on the right of the road. These also have numbers on them listed in MPH. what you have to do is read that sign quickly, and look at the speedometer in your car and attempt to match those two numbers. That's called traveling the speed limit.
Now, if you are really daring you can actually go about 5mph or so above that number and not get pulled over, depending on where you are. So, if you see a sign that says 60 when driving down the interstate, you make that dial in your car say 65, it's pretty unlikely that a cop will pull you over, and you will make the people behind you happy at not having to go to slow.
One final bit of advice for driving on the interstate. The reason it has more than one lane in each direction is to speed up the flow of traffic. One way this is done, is by the slower moving people (ones going 60 in a 60 zone) stay to the right side lane. The other people, the ones a little more daring and willing to exceed the limit by 5 or 10 miles per hour, should use the left lane to pass those slower moving vehicles. AND, if you notice a vehicle coming up behind you and you are in that left lane, you should move to the right lane and let them pass.
If for any reason you feel the need to go below the speed limit, and are not hauling heavy products, or in a vehicle that can't do the speed limit, you should take your car to the dealer, sell it, turn in your license and start riding the bus.
Tuesday, October 06, 2009
Friday, October 02, 2009
Monday, September 28, 2009
Thursday, September 24, 2009
The last time animals species were exterminated at the same rate was the dinosaurs: Most likely caused by a comet or asteroid hitting the planet. Now instead of a natural disaster or nature taking it's toll; the two legged, thumbed, walking locust is the cause.
Here's just a few:
- Sumatran Orangutan (Indonesia)
- Sumatran Tiger (Indonesia)
- Lear’s Macaw (Brazil)
- Brown Spider Monkey (Colombia, Venezuela)
- Rancho Grande Harlequin Frog (Venezuela)
- Panamanian Golden Frog (Panama)
- Pygmy Three-toed Sloth (Panama)
- Yellow-crested Cockatoo (Indonesia)
- Golden-bellied Capuchin (Brazil)
- Elegant Frog (Australia)
- Orinoco Crocodile (Colombia, Venezuela)
- Mountain Gorilla (Rwanda, Uganda, Democratic Republic of Congo)
- Golden Mantella (Madagascar)
- Eastern Red Colobus (Kenya)
- Javan Rhinoceros (Indonesia, Vietnam)
- Bonobo (Democratic Republic of Congo)
- Bornean Orangutan (Indonesia, Malaysia)
- Common Chimpanzee (Eastern and Central Africa)
- Golden Poison Frog (Colombia)
- Hyacinth Macaw (South America)
- Great Green Macaw (Central America)
- Maned Three-toed Sloth (Brazil)
- Diana Monkey (West Africa)
- Indian Wild Dog (Dhole) (South Asia)
- Aye-Aye (Madagascar)
- Indian Elephant (India and South East Asia)
- Golden Lion Tamarin (Brazil)
- Red Slender Loris (Sri Lanka)
- Proboscis Monkey (Indonesia)
- Javan Langur (Indonesia)
- Diademed Sifaka (Madagascar)
- Mahogany Glider (Australia)
- Giant Otter (South America)
- Bengal Tiger (South East Asia)
- Mountain Tapir and Baird’s Tapir (South America)
- Blue Poison Frog (Suriname)
- Giant Armadillo (South America)
- Jaguar (Central and South America)
- Harpy Eagle (Central and South America)
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
Full story on 2.tbo.com
Monday, September 21, 2009
Friday, September 18, 2009
There are times in life that I wish we could still give a swirly to someone, as I think the guy who walked in after me would have helped wet these two guys down. He wasn't impressed by the men's room etiquette violation either.
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Friday, September 11, 2009
Read more on MSNBC
Wednesday, September 09, 2009
We were all talking and having a good time before the show started, and I thought once the show started they would quite down a bit. During an occasional song they did quite down. But for the most part, they talked almost through the whole thing. And it's not like they were having a discussion that couldn't wait, or even really needed to happen at all. At one point ibwttmdac tried to bring me into the conversation. A conversation, at that moment, that consisted of see if we could do the Vulcan (two fingers to one side, two to the other) greeting. Then when proving I could do it with one hand, she asked me to do it with the other. After showing her that, the discussion was around who could do it the best and with which hand. The only real respite I got from the inane chatter was when they both went to the bathroom, and luckily took a while. Unfortunately upon returning they continued whatever conversation it was that they were having in the ladies room.
The only saving grace through the experience was that she somehow managed to keep her phone in her purse for the majority of the show, unlike some other attendees who spent a large amount of time texting others. What the hell is the point of going to see a show, spending money on tickets/booze/dinner/whatever, if all you are going to do it talk inanely throughout the whole thing, basically using the show as background noise?
Tuesday, September 08, 2009
Friday, September 04, 2009
After getting off the interstate, I'm on another arterial. This time, I'm behind a car that keeps hitting it's breaks- even though there is no car in front of it. When we make a turn and I get a chance to pass the car, I notice it's another Asian lady.
My workout buddy and good friend is Thai. And we used to take turns driving to the gym, but it got to the point that it was irritating and embarrassing to ride in the car with him, so that now I've just decided to be the designated driver.
I'm far from being a racist, but I do believe in stereotyping and Asians fit the stereotype. Here's the thing I don't get; I've been to south-east Asia, and I've seen the way they drive there. They drive like maniacs. Weaving in and out, racing along, so forth and so on. So how is it that in Asia they drive like they are trying to get somewhere, and in America Asians drive like they are 107 years old and blind on one eye.
Wednesday, September 02, 2009
giant panda adults eat up to 40 pounds of bamboo per day
panda's habitat in China is being destroyed and divided into smaller patches (mostly be highways and roads), pandas are having a hard time finding mates, threatening to reduce their gene pool under what is genetically viable to sustain the species.
Human activity - logging, animal grazing, and agriculture - are the major sources of habitat destruction.
Pandas used to be found everywhere on the mountains in central and south China, and in Myanmar and Vietnam. However, their living space has shrunk markedly and they are on the verge of extinction due to the climatic changes and human activities.
Today, pandas are found in six isolated forest areas in Sichuan, Gansu, and Shaanxi provinces in China.
With just over 1.3 billion people (1,330,044,605 as of mid-2008), China is the world's largest and most populous country.
The Giant Panda is an endangered species, threatened by continued habitat loss and by a very low birthrate, both in the wild and in captivity.
Monday, August 31, 2009
Friday, August 28, 2009
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
Friday, August 21, 2009
Relevant to our current society?
Poverty - about 25,000 people die every day of hunger or hunger-related causes. With about 32.3 million people living below the official poverty level, making a poverty rate of 11.8%. In 2005, one out of three urban dwellers (approximately 1 billion people) was living in slum conditions.
Oppression - Most recently we've seen Iran arresting protesters. China, one of the largest communist countries in the world is becoming the worlds largest economy. Ever heard of North Korea, Myanmar (Burma), or Sudan? "Oh but that's over there, we don't do that in America." We've had a civil war over slavery, we still have reservations for the Indians we've kicked off there land. McCarthyism in the 50's. We have laws that require permits to march and protest. The CIA regularly detains and integrates in secret suspected terrorists. Illegal government wire tapping, the creation of the department of homeland security, peoples names being added to airline watch lists. The FCC regulates what we watch on television or hear over the radio. Don't think we see government oppression? Just because it's not blatant, doesn't mean it doesn't happen.
War - world wide spending on the military comes to about 780 Billion dollars each year, with the United States spending about 12 billion a month on the Iraq war alone. To put that in prospective, less than one percent of what the world spends every year on weapons is needed to put every child into school. The news almost daily provides updates on the Iraq war, the war in Afghanistan, the wars in the middle east, war in Africa, conflict in South East Asia, and so on.
Violence - We have hate crimes against gays and lesbians, we have Muslims killing Christians, and Christians killing Muslims. We have movies, video games, and television full of killing and violence against others. We see more violence in a day, than we see two people kissing, making love, or being good to one another.
Disease - It was Bird flue, now it's Swine Flue. Who knows what next year will bring.
Pollution - Global warming, melting ice caps, mercury in our fish, The Great Pacific Garbage Patch. About a third of all mammals are endangered. We have species going extinct at an unprecedented rate, due to man made pollutants.
Nuclear fallout - not yet, although the U.S. has spent billions of dollars on a missile defense system. North Korea is testing missiles, and the number of countries capable of building nuclear bombs is increasing.
Human rights violations - Abu Ghraib Prison will always be remember for the human rights violations that went on there. We still have people held in Guantanamo Bay without trial. Whenever there is a war or a conflict, there are human rights violations that go along with it.
Unhappiness, suffering, and other kinds of pain - Americans pay more for prescription drugs than any other country in the world. We spend about 200 billion dollars on medications, with 34 billion dollars spent on alternative medicine. In fact we take so many narcotics, that are drinking water is becoming contaminated with it. Sounds like a lot of unhappy, suffering, and in pain people to me.
For anyone reading who might be thinking, "it's not that bad." lets look at the opposite- utopia. According to Wikipedia again, a utopian society encompass perfect socio-politico-legal system, an Ecological utopia, Economic utopia, Religious utopia, Scientific and technological utopia an earthly paradise
Hmmm, sounds like the scale leans more towards dystopia than utopia to me.
Thursday, August 20, 2009
Monday, August 17, 2009
Friday, August 14, 2009
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
I just got back from having drinks with the girls and I haven't laughed so hard in a long time. One of my girlfriends is having some bladder problems. I know what your thinking. She must be old and probably not in good shape... Totally the opposite. She's about 35 awsome body and very cute. Anyway, her doctor sent her to a physical therapist who specializes in keegal (don't know how to spell it ) exercises. She is to see this therapist every week for a month were they practice doing all different kinds of exercises. She practices on her own for about 10minutes than he yes he measures her success by by sticking his fingers up her vagina and feeling the size of her bladder and how tight she can make herself. If this does not work she will than be shown how to use circular toys to make her tighter. Now if this isn't bad enough her therapist is really kind of cute and not married. The only good thing about this besides us having the best laugh ever was she gave us all the instruction on how to do proper keegal exercises and if she needs it we all get some toys. So If any of you men or women need a new job this might be something to look into
Monday, August 10, 2009
Thursday, August 06, 2009
How my job equates to being a teacher and working with young children.
- Have to hold hands. My job consists of making sure others are doing there job, and not upsetting them in the process.
- Be careful of swearing or saying anything offensive, like kids we don't want to offend or they might cry, so will the developers and PM at Microsoft.
- When they get upset about something they will pout or cry.
- Have to talk down to them, so they will understand - dumb it down.
- Presentation need lots of color and bubbles. The 07 version of Power Point has lots of great ways of making that presentation look cool to keep their attention
- Need to provide them with playtime (aka moral builders).
- If they go without enough sleep, or are sick, they will get cranky.
- If they do a good job, they get a prize. Ie, plaque, certificate, or a kudos in a e-mail
- If they do a bad job, they get rewarded as well, because we wouldn't want anyone to feel bad
- The teachers/bosses pet get's the promotion, sweet jobs, and primo office
Monday, August 03, 2009
Not your normal blog but I thought I would send it anyway. I just got back from a vacation with the family. My kids and I had a great time but I almost killed my family.
We rented a house (that I found ) it had 3 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms and a private pool. Grandma and Grandpa got one room, makes since. My brother in-law and his wife got another and they brought a friend who got the other room. I got the couch in the great room with all the kids! I went to my mother in-law( actually ex mother in-law ) and told her I was going to take the other bedroom. Her response was " Her husband MIGHT be coming up later so then were would he sleep" I said it was not my problem. When or if he does come then I will move back out to the couch. It was then brought to my attention well you are single so no matter what sleeping on the couch was not a big deal but her and her husband could not fit on the couch. Fine, I' ll take the couch. Her husband came up a day later and that left me on the couch and sharing a bathroom with 5 children, again not a big deal "because I was single " and only need a bathroom with a shower. I did not need a sunken tub in my bathroom because I had nobody to share it with. The real kicker was the romantic nights in the pool that I just don't understand "because I am single" I let this all go because I decided I was just going to have a great time with my kids. I was fine until I got back from my vacation and found out my girls vacation we had planned to the wineries has been changed to staying at a friends cabin because her husband doesn't think it's a good idea for a bunch of women to hang out and drink at the spa for 3 day's. Whatever! I called my friend and again after a long conversation I got "you just don't understand cause your single" I just want to know what the HELL does that have to do with anything.
I maybe single but that does not mean I'm not seeing anyone. I am seeing someone and just because we are not married or even getting married, ever. We still have respect for each other, I trust him and he trust me. We still do whatever we want. I think that's the problem with everyone. No body trust anybody and God forbid they do anything by themselves or have a life of there own. I am glad I'm single.